


Where the Sleeper Wakes

by SinclairMaxwell



Series: Sleeper Trilogy [2]
Category: Harry Potter - Fandom, Lord of the Rings (Movies)
Genre: M/M, Male Preg, Slash, dub-con
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-06-10
Updated: 2013-05-22
Packaged: 2017-11-07 11:21:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 14
Words: 26,590
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/430549
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SinclairMaxwell/pseuds/SinclairMaxwell
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sequel to Where the Sleeper Waits. The war is over and Valo and Legolas are just settling down for parenthood but not all is as it should be. Something dark haunts the small teen and it could shake Arda to the very foundations of the earth. Mpreg, slash!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Discord

AN: Okay, so I know that it's waaaaayyy later than expected but here it is. I know it has no indentations. This author has updated her typing technology and I haven't quite figured out how to indent on my tablet yet.

Disclaimer: I own nothing at all, except a one eyed monster dog named Merceillious. True fact.

Chapter One: Discord

The battle for the soul of Middle Earth had ended, the Ring and its Master destroyed. Gimli had returned to Helm's Deep to settle a dwarf colony there in the face of the loss of Moria. Aragorn was crowned king, uniting the northern and southern kingdoms from the shores of Forlindon and Tolfolas to Forodwaith and Rhun and at last being married to his beloved Arwen. Samwise Gamgee, after the departure of Frodo to the Undying Lands, became the Mayor of the Shire, enjoying a peaceful life with his lovely Rosie and their first born, Elanor. Even Eowen and Faramir announced their happy ending at Aragorn's coronation. Everyone got their happy endings, right?

"What are you doing hiding about, child? Skulking around for my son's return, no doubt."

I sighed inwardly, my secret heart sinking in disappointment. Give me Wargs and Orcs. For Elrond's sake, give me Gothmog, Lord of Balrogs! Anything but in-laws. I rubbed my heavy belly tenderly, soothing both myself and the babe within. A true elf, my child had grown extremely sensitive to my emotional state. Legolas had been very pleased, declaring our little one an elf prodigy even in the womb. His father, Lord Thranduil, had been less than pleased, not with the child, but with me.

"Yes, my lord," he sneered in disdain, "Legolas said that he would return by sunset. I just wanted to welcome him home."

It didn't matter what I said. Thranduil had endeavored to dislike me as much as he could. My only saving grace in his eyes was the progeny in my stomach, his grandson and future heir to the Mirkwood throne. It had forced him to remain just this side of civil and only when Legolas was near, was his disdain even minorly tempered.

"And what would be the purpose of this benevolent action? No doubt your kind does nothing without having some incentive or meaning behind it. You are not my son's keeper, he is yours." He drawled, completely ignoring the fact that he was doing much the same thing.

My nerves stalled for a moment and my hands resumed their motions on my belly nervously. If i didn't reveal my desire to the Elf Lord, he would only accuse me of deception but...I bit the inside of my cheek, spilling my hearts desire forth for his judgment.

"I've been taking in so many new memories and it is my belief that they are from the time before I was brought to Middle Earth, from the Otherplace. I wished to see if perhaps Legolas would allow me to go to Mordor to look for some clue to my past. Perhaps in Barad-Dur there would be something-" but my timid explanation was shortlived.

At the very mention of my former home, Thranduil's body grew rigid and his face cold and infuriated.

"Enough!" The Lord drew close, his face close enough to my own that it would appear to anyone else as though we were whispering to one another, "Enough. I have put up with your unfortunate bonding with my son but Valar help me if you think I will abide you dragging my son into Mordor with you. You will not harm my son and I will see you locked away before I let you crawl back to that hole and take him with you. I wont have Legolas used as some Morgul sacrifice for some dark deed. Rest assured, I know what you are. I will not be blinded." The hate in his voice was enough to make me tremble with its intensity.

So maybe my happily ever isn't so perfect. Even after my name was cleared by the King and my story known, people didn't forget you cutting down their fellows or endangering their loved ones. People didn't forgive the fact that you'd shared a soul with a Dark Lord. Silence stretched between us as my arms folded over my abdomen instinctually and neither of us filled the void. It was a long and bitter silence broken only by the chirping of birds in the courtyard. Before long, Thranduil's face broke into a large smile and he hissed under his breath, "You may have trapped my son into a union with you with that little burden inside you but rest assured that Elves live eternal and you will not. I can wait. Legolas! How was your ride, my son?"

I schooled my face into as much of a smile as I was able to after Thranduil's abuse, my heart lightening just enough to ease the sorrow when my eyes found gleaming silver smiling down at me. This was what made it all worth it. This love right here. I had suffered Sauron's torments for all of the Ages of Elves. I could put up with one in-laws dislike. Though...it would taste a lie if I said it didn't hurt. It seemed that even in my husband's home I would never really be welcome. It was a sobering thought. Legolas embraced me with a deep and joyful kiss, his hand dropping to stroke lovingly along my belly. He must have seen something in my eyes because his smiling eyes turned into one of question.

"Valo, did you need something? You seem troubled." He stroked my head with a tenderness that I could never get from another, his eyes searching my face calmly.

Thranduil shot me a look filled with such menace that my hands fell back to my stomach fearfully. I gave Legolas a shaky smile, kissing his palm. He was so dear to me...

"Just...morning sickness. Thats all." Came my half-hearted response, carefully avoiding Thranduil's heavy gaze.

Legolas' frown did not disperse but before he could call my lie, I gave his hand an adoring squeeze and retreated back to our rooms and the private garden there. It had become my sanctuary in a home that would never be my own.

~Legolas~

He watched his bonded walk back in the direction of their rooms, frowning at Valo's retreating back. Morning sickness. Right. Ever since he and Valo had married, he had learned to be wary of his father and husband being alone together. He could hear the snide comments Thranduil made not entirely in private. He had expressed his "concern" when Legolas had first announced their engagement. It seemed ad though Valo was determined to not let his father in law rule his feelings but as time went on and their first child was announced, Legolas had begun to notice something he hadn't seen before. Whenever Valo walked down the hall, everyone suddenly had somewhere else to be. When he walked into a ballroom, the whole half of the room would gravitate away. Valo began spending more and more time in their rooms and in the garden, rarely venturing out, even for meals. That was something they would have to remedy.

Valo had also been having nightmares. Strange dreams that would wake him at all hours. He would be too afraid to go back to sleep or sit pensively for hours, pondering over what he'd seen but of which he would never speak. It was disconcerting for someone who had before been able to fight whatever had frightened his mate to be so out of the loop and helpless. Perhaps a change of scenery would benefit his quiet husband. Maybe a trip to Minas Tirith to visit Aragorn. The warrior king had always been able to soothe Valo's hurt when no one else could, oftentimes to Legolas' dismay. When Valo had found he was with child, who was the first one he told? Aragorn. When Theoden persecuted him during the Last Great War, it was Aragorn who comforted him. When Valo had first come to them after Frodo was taken to Imladris, who was the person Valo first confided in when Legolas had only tried to put him down like some wild animal? To his shame, it had been the Ranger from the north who quelled Valo's fears and spoke up for him when no one else would. True, Legolas had been foolish in the past and careless with his beloved's fragile heart but he had resolved to spend the rest of their eternity making up for the hurt he'd caused. He still dreamed about that arrow jutting from his mate's stomach. A stomach that now held his firstborn child. It had starred in his most recent nightmares of late. Wasn't it the late Theoden who had narrowed the experience down to it's tacks?

'Dark have been my dreams of late.'

Nothing could describe it better. Could it be perhaps, that Valo was...unhappy? Unhappy here? Unhappy with him? Sure, it had been a big change going from living in the desolation of Mordor to the Elvin home in Mirkwood but that had been a good change, right? Sure, he knew that his father was being less than accommodating but Valo seemed like he was handling it alright. The isolation that Valo was facing each day from the elves around him mirrored his treatment at the hands of Theoden's soldiers for Legolas' liking. Even the people who Valo had been helping had scorned and rejected him, had said cruel things. Hmm. Perhaps he should say something to his father after all. Thranduil wrapped an arm around his son's shoulder's, his whole being opening up with adoration. Whatever may be said, Thranduil was a loving, doting father.

"What is on your mind, Legolas?" He asked, his voice filled with affection.

No doubt he wouldn't be so open when his words were addressed. Legolas sighed, looking to his father guardedly.

"What was it that you were saying to Valo before I came in?"

His father's smile became icy and bitter and Legolas felt his heart grow cold with it. He had known that his Ada and Valo didn't really see eye to eye but surely Thranduil wasn't going out of his way to be cruel, right?

"Ah, Legolas, what a way to greet your father. Can I not have simple conversation with your husband? We share the same house now after all." He replied though his words were like ice chips falling to the floor.

"I am starting to wonder, Ada." Legolas' voice must have been too mistrusting for Thranduil's liking for his expression became frigid.

"It seems your little husband is already sowing discord among us. Typical of his kind."

He couldn't believe he was hearing this. From his own father no less.

"His kind? He is MY kind now, Ada, my husband and I love him." He breathed out, his stomach squirming with discomfort and disappointment. Was this really how the rest of their lives were going to be? Valo silently hurting and he defending him from his own friends and family. What about when the baby came? What then? That trip to Minas Tirith was looking better and better. For them both.

"My son, it is a whore's vengeance and a fool's errand for him to want to take you back to that place, drag you back into the heart of Barad-dur, just for some simple minded desire. He wants to take you back to Mordor for his own selfish purposes. After all, the Dark Lord used his body for Ages, who knows if there isn't some piece of Sauron left behind. It could be infecting your child even as we speak."

A whore. Is that how his people saw Valo? His small beloved had never spoken of the things whispered about him, not always just behind his back, but Legolas saw hid unhappiness for what it was now.

"Father, the quest of the One Ring was a fool's errand as well, but we went because we believed in it and I believe in Valo. We will not be going to Barad-dur," Thranduil smiled his satisfaction, "but we will be going to Minas Tirith and I will decide where else from there. If I had know from the beginning how staying here would affect him, I would not have brought Valo to live here. Maybe I could have done something before this all got out of hand."

"Legolas-"

"I love you, Ada, with all my heart but Valo is my mate. He carries my child and even now has a heart kind enough that he said nothing so as not to compromise you in my eyes. It is my duty to see to his happiness and so that is what I am going to do. We will leave on the morrow at sunrise."


	2. Return to Minas Tirith

AN: Its here and not a moment too soon. Just in case any of you didn't catch the warnings in the summary or the first chapter, this will be Mpreg and Slash, as always. Don't like, don't read and don't complain cause I won't listen.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Chapter Two: Return to Minas Tirith

~Valokiloren~

True to his word, we set out the next day. Thranduil was silent as we left but his eyes on me were not friendly ones. I could feel their burn on me even so far as the Celduin river. Once we were clear of Mirkwood and Thranduil's reign, I finally breathed a sigh of relief. Our journey was tense though. Legolas had been a still, silent form behind me the entire ride, his figure fuming and simmering in his anger. I couldn't tell who he was more angry with, me or his father. I couldn't help the deep regret I felt at our flight. Because of me, Legolas and his father were fighting, maybe a fight that would damage their relationship forever. We were fleeing the only home he'd ever known because of me. What kind of spouse couldn't suck up a bit of isolation for their husband's sake, for Legolas' happiness? It was shameful. I was so deeply ashamed of myself it made me sick. Thranduil's words were jusg that. Words. Legolas and I had only been bonded for a year. Maybe his father just needed time to deal with his heir's marriage to someone from Mordor. To someone like me.

I played with the end of my long braid, idly, trying to distract myself from the rigid anger from the elf prince holding onto me in the saddle. I wanted to ride my flying branch, my broomstick as my mind supplied, but Legolas had put a quick and cut off refusal to that immediately. He wasn't going to have his pregnant spouse flying high in the air and as fast as I was wont to go. We settled down to camp for the night some ways past the old forest road. Our elvish bred mare was fast and I had helped her hooves along with a bit of magic. Now that we were on our way, I was eager to see Aragorn and Arwen again. They had announced to all of Middle Earth their plans to adopt me at his coronation and much to the disbelief of many, they had followed through. To even more people's surprise and the particular disdain of a certain Elf Lord, Legolas and I had also announced our bonding that same day. I got the love of my life and a loving family all in the same day. And what did I do to repay him? Ruin my husband's relationship with his father.

Legolas returned with firewood and I quietly set fire to the pile, trying to ease his chores for the evening. I gave him a small, shaky smile, trying my best to diffuse the tension. It only served to deepen his frown. Legolas settled down next to me, his anger seeming to dissipate with a heavy sigh. I observed my husband, really looked at him, for the first time in awhile. Despite his immortality, Legolas had changed since the War. Not in a way that anyone else would really take notice of but in a way that only those intimately close to him would see. His eyes held a world weariness to them that he didn't have when we had first met. He was more protective of me, rarely letting me out of his sight. He always knew where I was nowadays. It hurt my heart to know that I had helped to put that look in his eyes.

"Why didn't you tell me that he was hurting you?" Three guesses who he was referring to and the first two don't count.

I shrugged one shoulder, drawing patterns in the dirt with a discarded twig.

"They were just words, Legolas. I didn't want to ruin your relationship with your father because of some careless words." I whispered, trying to seem nonchalant about it. Apparently, my attempt failed.

"Valo! If someone is hurting you, saying cruel things to you, you tell me! I don't care who it is! I would fight the Valar themselves if it meant they couldn't hurt you anymore." My heart lightened and no matter how much I tried to hide it, I felt a smile stretch across my face. He wrapped his arms around me, holding me as securely as if we were back in our own bed in Mirkwood, "How is the baby?" His hands came to rest on my softly sloping belly, rubbing circles on it reassuringly.

I grinned at his enthusiasm for our steadily growing child. Nothing could have made me happier than the baby growing inside me right then.

"Baby-like." He released the chuckle I had been aiming for, squeezing me in a tight hug. Everything was going to be alright.

~WHERETHESLEEPERWAKES~

Minas Tirith was once again the shining jewel of the kingdom. After the dwarves and elf nations had banded together to repair the city together, it was, if possible even grander than before. It stood as a testament to the new alliance between Men, Elves and Dwarves with a curious mixture of the architecture of all three. No matter who he was married to and where he had lived, this place would always feel like coming home. Why you ask?

"Eldarion! My sweet one, you're radiant as ever."

That was why. Valo gave a huge grin, rushing over to the Queen of Men. Arwen was as beautiful as she ever could be, practically radiating with joy. She had hinted in her letters that very soon, her and Aragorn may be trying for a sibling for him. It had filled his heart with joy to know that everyone was finally moving on with their lives after the threat if Sauron had been eliminated. Truth be told, he still woke up some nights in a fog, begging his Master for forgiveness. Some nights, he still awoke, his body on fire from a dream of how his Master would touch him. On those nights he felt more worthless than it was possible to be and all he could do was hide himself away until dawn or allow Legolas to touch him, easing his fear and his memories all in one. Arwen smelled of water and spring rain as she wrapped her arms around him. Aragorn stood behind her, watching his family reunite with a smile steadily growing like a flower on his mouth.

"Eldarion, we've missed you. What imparts this surprise visit? Not that we aren't overjoyed to have you home of course."

Eldarion. The name filled him with a hope that sprang eternal. Aragorn and Arwen had given him that name after he had been adopted. They had wanted to give him the chance for a new life away from the stigma of his Morgul name and his old life. No matter what name he was under, though, the whispers followed him still. Whispers of the darkness inside him. That his child was a monster and that it was a product of the union of he and Sauron through the Witch King. People whispered as he walked by that he would give birth to the next Dark Lord. Legolas, approached Aragorn whispering something that Valo couldn't catch but had the King give a double take towards his friend. Arwen must have caught the words with her elf hearing though because she gave him a fiercer hug, wrapping her kind arma around his middle.

"Come, love, let's leave those two to themselves and I'll show you your rooms. Maybe you can draw me one of those lovely portraits you do while we send word to Ada."

"Yes, Naneth."

~Legolas~

"Your father rejected him?" Aragorn's voice was full of surprise.

I watched him pace, unable to quell the feeling of failure inside me. I should have noticed that Valo was unhappy instead of focusing so much on my own happiness. I should have put a stop to my father's hurtful words when they first emerged, should have made my feelings clear.

"Rather spectacularly. He called him a whore as I recall." Aragorn bristled dangerously at the slight to his child, "I've yet to decide whether we're going to return to my father's house but unless something changes, I'll be moving Valo elsewhere. Perhaps to our summer home nearer Gladden Fields. Somewhere were Valo doesn't have to feel...unwanted."

Aragorn clapped me on the shoulder, offering his support and sympathy.

"How bad was it?" He ventured quietly.

The guilt torn into me, a steady weight in my soul. I felt as if I'd let down the one I loved. Like I'd failed to protect him just as I failed to protect him at Morannon.

"Theoden at Pelennor Fields bad. Is this all my fault, Estel? Did I fail him again?"

There it was, out in the open. My worst fears given word. Estel gave me a bitter smile. It had been the same fears he himself had once when the entire world seemed against our kind Valo, even me. Estel was the only one who had stood by him while everyone else scorned him. It wasn't a time that I was very proud of.

"Eh, you know that Valo has always been secretive about his feelings. Unfortunately especially when he's being hurt."

Valo still had 'MINE' scarred on his arm as a testament to that sad fact. I could still remember the sight of him when I saw him standing in the middle of a battlefield, alone and forlorn. Valo looked as if he had expected to die that day. His wrists had been red and weeping from the bonds he had just been cut from, his hair lank and loose. His eyes had held such weariness and grief that it had hurt to even look at him. His face was thin and it was painfully apparent that he hadn't been eating or sleeping. He looked as if he were Fading, little by little. It was the picture I'd had of him just before the Nazgul had snatched him up and carried him back to Mordor, back to his Master. The next time I saw him, we were on opposing ends of a battle field. Aragorn pulled me out of my dark thoughts as he led me out of his war room and towards the rooms that Valo and I would share.

~WhereTheSleeperWakes~

"These are lovely, Valo."

He turned a bright smile on Arwen as she leaned over his latest drawing. The four of them were lounging in the gardens, soaking in the bright sun rays and enjoying the fine weather. The cool breeze teased his loose hair, the strands floating like wisps of cloud around him. Legolas sat on a bench nearby, whittling a toy for their child's future nursery. It was a small wooden oak leaf, just a piece of what would be a mobile above the baby's crib. The musky, pleasant smell of Aragorn's pipe reminded Valo of their journey just two years ago, when the King was just a Ranger and he and Gandalf would sit with Valo, smoking, while the Morgul teen watched over four young hobbits playing. The memory of it made the soon to be new parent smile as his mother settled in next to him on the grassy turf. Their two companions were listening in, eager to know of the drawings that Valo had been so secretive of. Valo took in the picture with a fond eye. A lovely woman with red hair like sunrise and eyes like newly sprouted spring leaves. She was on the arm of a man with strange spectacles in his eyes and unruly hair as dark as night. He was looking down at the woman beside him like she was his entire world. It really looked like the image could come to life at any moment. He could almost see the two coming to life on the very paper they were born on.

Valo took a deep breath, unsure of how his words would be taken. He hadn't told Legolas much about the visions he'd been having. Somehow, he felt like it made him stand out more, like he were more unusual.

"I think they were my parents. When I was in the other place."

His words made his husband and father stand to take notice. They all sat below the canopy of the trees, staring at an image of a couple whose fate they would never know.


	3. Nightmares and Dreamscapes

AN: Alright, here you go, you heathens. I expect loads of reviews in return. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: Nope.

Chapter Three: Nightmares and Dreamscapes

There was a giant snake coming towards him. A basilisk, Tom whispered in his mind. So he wasn't as alone in his sleep as he'd thought. There was a heavy yet familiar weight in his hand though his dream self held it awkwardly. A sword. He was holding a sword. His arm was warm with blood though somehow he knew that he wasn't injured. Not anymore at least. There was a small figure lying sprawled on the floor a few yards away and still another, hauntingly familiar form standing closer still. Tom Riddle. Valo had seen this before. Had lived this before. But that was where memory started to diverge into nightmare. With a strange, ghost like sensation, Valo felt momentarily weightless before he was suddenly watching his body -no, Harry Potter's body, for surely he couldn't be that frail, bedraggled child he was watching now- storm off to fight the basilisk, moving as a residual haunting would, never breaking with the memory sequence. However, someone else wasn't keeping to the script. Tom Riddle stood regal, young and so different from both Sauron and the Tom he'd come to know. And he was staring right at him. Brown eyes bled a sickly familiar crimson, boring into Valo with a lust that could set stone aflame. There was anger there too and hate but always the lust, the will to dominate in whatever capacity possible. The trembling new parent found himself backed against one of the cold, damp walls, an icy, strong hand at his throat. 

"You've been so naughty, pet. So unkind. You've hurt me. So it's only fair that I hurt you now. Its only fair..."

Frigid lips covered his own and no matter how much he wanted to turn away, to hold true and faithful to Legolas, his body wouldn't budge. Hands pulled his elvish garb apart as quickly as if Riddle had used magic. Maybe he had. What kind of dream was this? The memory still held sway behind them, playing out like some play or book. Icy hands suddenly found his bare skin and Valo arched into the touch, the subzero fingers leaving what felt like trails of fire across his flesh. His voice finally found life and he whimpered a soft plea.

"No...stop this, Tom." 

The moment that the enraged veridian orbs turned on him, Valo knew that this was not his Tom he was dealing with. The infuriated Dark Lord to-be slammed his head cruelly into the wall, his skull crashing into the slimy stone with the force of a sledgehammer. 

"You will not tell me no! You will not refuse me! I am your Master! I made you what you are!" Riddle raged, slamming the helpless Istari into the wall with each syllable. 

This was his Master, what had he been thinking by refusing him?

He is NOT our Master. We have no Master. Legolas takes care of us now. He gave us a home, a baby. Freedom and love.

We hurt him! We have to pay the price! He only wanted to keep us safe, thats why we Slept!

He hurt us, tortured us. He forced us when we didn't want it and he's going to do it again.

True to it's word, Valo was slammed this time face down on the ground, his clothes torn away. Cruel crimson stared down at him, soaking in his pain while his legs were jerked into a painful position.

Don't look. Don't let it get through to you. Focus on something else. The bricks on the wall or the scales on the basilisk's hide. Don't look at him.

Valo took in the scene before him, watching the memory, his memory, play out. He memorized every detail as Riddle had his way with him. Perhaps it was the way of dreams but the more he focus on that memory, the sight of his former self saving a young girl's life, the less he could feel what was happening to him. The less it hurt. Nothing, though, could prepare him for what came next. Riddle turned him over to face him, apparently finished slaking his desire. His face was calm but filled with a horrible purpose that chilled his victim to the bone. Valo wasn't sure when his face had become covered in tears but Riddle reached down to wipe one away. 

"You hurt me. You betrayed me. So it's only fair...its only fair that I hurt you."

Before Valo could even contemplate what was about to happen, before he could even attempt to react, Riddle was wrist deep in his pregnant belly, crushing the life out of his only child. Blood poured from the horrific wound and just as Riddle was tearing his still baby from his body, Valo screamed.

~Legolas~

I'd been awake for some time, watching as Valo slept, caught in the throes of another nightmare. I could tell what he was dreaming by the way his body arched and the way he moaned in his sleep. Even after death, that bastard haunted him, hurting him. This wasn't the first time this had happened. Valo dreamed of Sauron and what he used to do to him often. Sometimes, I would touch him afterwards, chasing out the feel of another's touch, replacing it with thoughts of my own. Othertimes, Valo disappeared, hiding himself in shame. Those times, I could follow him to the closet or the bathroom where he would hide and just listen to my husband weep as if his heart were being pulled into pieces. He would cry himself to exhaustion and I would have the charge of carrying him back to our bed to sleep.

Tonight was a different occurrence, however. Almost as soon as I reached to wake him, Valo's eyes flew open and he released the most horrific, terror filled shriek I had ever heard. He shot up in bed, clawing at the sheets as if he would free himself from some grip that he could not escape. He was bawling as if his very soul would escape with the tears, clutching him rounded belly with both arms, shielding it from view. It almost looked as if he were trying to keep the baby in. I tried shushing him, tried to pull him from the terrified miasma he was trapped in but Valo seemed trapped in the aftershocks of a nightmare so intense that it rocked his very core. At last, I seized him by his shoulders, my own fear for him taking hold of me, and shook him as Aragorn and Arwen burst into the room, swords drawn.

"Valo! Valo, wake up!"

The moment that the King burst into our rooms, my small mate went rigid, his eyes finding Aragorn in an expression that I couldn't and didn't dare try to interpret. His body heave a great shudder before Valo dissolved into terrified tears, clutching me as if I was the last solid thing in Arda. I sighed, not entirely surprised to feel it leave me, shaky and uncertain. Aragorn settled on the bed next to us, stroking Valo's dark hair calmly. It would be noontime the next day before Valo would fall back to sleep.

~Valokiloren~

The train station was dark for the first time since I'd ever been in it's walls. The fog rolled just as thick as ever and the train - the Boggarts Mispress? No, that wasn't quite right.- was woefully absent. I had some reserves about going back to sleep but I knew that this wasn't just a was thst place between dreaming, waking and the unconscious. This was where Tom dwelled, where I came to talk to him. No one else knew about him. Not even Gandalf. A young girl's voice echoed in his mind at the thought.

'No, Harry. Even in the wizarding world, hearing voices isn't a good sign.'

She had been...a friend? Yes, a friend. I'd had a friend. Speaking of friend's...

"Tom? Tom, are you here?" My voice echoed through the cavernous hall, bouncing around the fog and stone. 

I caught sight of that small child, the apparition that looked so much like me if I were a child once more. It ducked back into the fog, disappearing as if it hadnever been there to begin with. Just a trick of the fog. 

"I'm here, Valo."

The voice came from a pillar over by an empty stretch of wall nearby. I could see the edge of his cloak around the stone but it wasn't until I approached that I saw the blood too. It cascaded down his left shoulder from a rather nasty looking headwound. There was also a steady trickle of it down one pant leg, a very familiar wound that had me cringing back in memory of my Master and his treatment. Who had done this? Who COULD have done this? Tom was inside of me, after all. He had been fine the last time we spoke. Perhaps a little tired looking but unharmed. Could this have been a product of my nightmare, shown on Tom's less than physical body? 

"Tom...you're hurt." I felt immediately foolish for stating something so obvious. 

He seemed to forgive me, though. His eyes had deep circles beneath them, his usually flawless hair falling into his eyes. He looked exhausted.

"Rest easy, little one. I am well for now, considering." 

My lip trembled under the crush of guilt I felt suddenly. Somehow, I knew that this was because of me. Tom was hurt because of me.

"None of that, Valo. Be well. I need to tell you something and I need you to pay attention when I say this." His voice was so serious that I obeyed without thought, standing up at attention.

"Alright."

He seemed to struggle with what to say for a long moment, grimacing in distaste at the blood covering half of his face.

"I'm not always going to be here. There is going to come a time when I won't be here for you anymore and you will have to stand on your own." Tom's eyes were on my abdomen as he shakily lit a cigarette. His eyes were sharp as if he were memorizing something that he may not have the chance to witness. It felt almost as if he could see right through me.

My hands fell to my belly protectively, my heart suddenly seeming to stop. A terrible thought sprang unbidden to my mind, so intense that it stole the very breath from my lungs.

"Is my baby going to be alright?"

He wrapped an arm around my waist, pulling me in to rest against him. My face was pillowed against his bloodied cloak but I found I didn't mind as much as I should. The smell of his clove cigarettes and the strange smell that was purely his own calmed me nearly instantly.

"I'm not going to always be here, Harry..." His voice faded as I began to wake.

~WhereTheSleeperWakes~

"You will, of course, stay here for the remainder of your pregnancy. Such traveling isn't good for you or the little one. That kind of journey is too hard on the body. No, Valo, I won't hear any different. Ease an old man's heart, won't you?"

The grinning teen halted his protest, throwing a handful of flowers at his adoptive father.

"I'm older than you, old man!" He laughed, spreading out on the soft grass of the gardens. It was his favorite place. He grinned cheekily over his belly, realizing that it was getting harder to see over the bump.

Arwen gave a smile herself, trying to cover her amusement.

"It's true. In fact, he is older than Grandmother Galadriel and my Ada combined. If the research intk Sauron's reign is correct and as Eldarion has said, he came with the Dark Lord to Arda then that would put his age at roughly 11,954."

Aragorn and Legolas both shared a look of disbelief. Valo blushed, rushing to change the subject.

"You're doing research?"

Arwen gave him an intrigued nod.

"Yes, it turns out that you're mentioned in manuscripts back as far as the waking of the Elves. Not many, mind. Sauron was very careful about that."

Valo soaked in that information as Legolas passed him a stew of mushrooms and lentils.


	4. "If life is a dream, better you dread the waking!"

An: Alright so here's the next chapter! Enjoy!

Chapter Four ~"If life is a dream, better you dread the waking!"

~Aragorn~

There was something different about Valo. I could see the minute changes the longer he and Legolas stayed in Minas Tirith. Occasionally, I would catch him standing in place, staring out the window for some time and then he would shake to awareness, seemingly uncertain how long he'd dazed off for. Valo seemed to ponder these day dreamings as if they struck a chord inside him. Almost as if they were familiar but he couldn't place from where. Everytime he would wake from sleeping, he seemed unrested, disturbed. Legolas said he was being plagued by nightmares. It was something that I aimed to bring up to Lord Elrond when he arrived from Rivendale. The Elves of his house were preparing for their journey to the Undying Lands. Their journey had been postponed due to Valo's pregnancy. Half of me feared that Elrond waited only to reassure himself that the rumors weren't true and that Valo's child wouldn't emerge as some sort of devilish monster.

~Valokiloren~

I woke from the dark promise of my Master's touch to an empty bedroom. The window had been left open, allowing the pleasant cool spring breeze to filter in and stir the curtains in the room Legolas and I shared. My husband had insisted I go to bed for the baby's sake instead of staying up to speak with everyone. It may have been in turn to the sideways glances many of the residents of the citadel gave me. I couldn't blame them, I suppose. Many of them remembered me from the days of the war, even if I didn't remember them. There was a peculiar tingling on my skin and a strange warmth around my mid-section when I shifted, an uncomfortable heaviness, and my face scrunched into a frown. That was odd. Neither I nor Lady Arwen had placed any protection around my stomach, not with the safety of Minas Tirith and the threat of the Enemy now gone. There shouldn't be any warmth. I shifted once more, before tugging the bed sheets back only to find not soft linen sheets beneath me but a great pool of blood.

A deathly scream shattered the peaceful stillness of the Minas Tirith night.

~WhereTheSleeperWakes~

Legolas stood at his bonded's bedroom door sadly, staring at the form huddled on the new sheets. His friend's soft steady footsteps approached him from down the hall.

"How is he?" Aragorn asked in a whisper.

His worry for his ward creased his handsome brow.

"Physically, he is well. I've called for Gandalf. He lost the baby..."

A soft inhalation of air was his only response. G

"I'm so sorry, my friend. Do the Healers know why?"

Legolas turned away from the room to face his friend. He shut the door behind him in case Valo woke and heard them. They had no proof yet so he didn't want the teen to get the wrong idea.

"No. They say for some reason, his body just rejected the pregnancy. And now those cursed marks are back."

The King's eyes narrowed in thought. The marks weren't fading...those strange marks decorating Valo's skin in a language more ancient than even the Black Speech, so ancient only Valo and Sauron himself were able to speak it. The teen had been so tight lipped on the matter that it may as well not exist to him. The marks had appeared just as Sauron met his end. Legolas would never forget the sight of his beloved lying in the tower of Minas Morgul, so vulnerable and weak and the Witch King lying in repose by the door. As if, even as he sacrificed himself so Valo could live, he tried to escape the horrific pain of his essence being drained from him, his very soul and being breaking down before his eyes. The marks had appeared after Barad-Dur had fallen, once they were on their way to regroup at Osgiliath. It had taken only two hours before they began to fade, not time enough for Gandalf to have a chance to sit down and look at them and they had not reappeared since. Until now.

"Do you think-" Aragorn began but his friend silenced him with a shake of his pale head. "I don't know what to think..."

Their greatest fear went unspoken as if by speaking it out loud it could make it true, could bring it into being.

Gandalf rode like the wind heralding storms into the city, Shadowfax carrying the Istari the whole way. He rushed into the receiving chamber where Aragorn and Lord Elrond consoled the distraught and grieving elf prince. Lady Arwen had stayed behind to sing lullabies to her adoptive child like a true mother.

"Legolas, tell me everything." He urged him, his voice filled with seriousness.

~WhereTheSleeperWakes~

Valo sat up in bed, his eyes half lidded and faded. The room was dark and Arwen had stepped out to retrieve a book from her husband's library. It was as if he were still sleeping, his eyes not registering anything as his body crept from the room, taking his traveling cloak from it's place by the door to the Garden's as he slipped unnoticed from the darkness of his lone bedroom. He slipped through a small opening in the Garden wall, taking to the stables. He chose a steed ready for travel and rode into the night. His marks were blacker than ever, including an odd curling lightning bolt shaped mark on his forehead. In the pits of his shattered emerald green eyes were flaming crimson pin pricks.

~Legolas~

"Have your Healers checked him yet?"

"Yes, they could not find anything wrong. No reason for the sudden rejection. Do you think some magic could be behind this? Something left over from the War perhaps?" Aragorn was being a good friend. He was stepping up and asking all the right questions when my mind had fallen blank with grief. Valo's baby - OUR baby- was gone. And no one had any answers to give us yet as to why. It reminded me of when I was young, during the time when Amon Lanc was beginning to spread the shadow of Sauron across Mirkwood, when my mother went missing and of all the searching my Ada did, only her bloodied clothing was found just past the Old Forest Road. I couldn't understand why she would just leave me alone and no one could give me the answers I needed. Gandalf would later find her in the dungeons of Dol Guldur but he would never tell me what he saw there, only that she had been dead some time. Looking back, I was glad he spared me that horror. The image of my sweet mother as a twisted, tortured thing was not what I wanted my last thoughts of her to be. Just as now my sole thoughts of Valo was of him screaming in terror, surrounded by his own blood. Our baby's blood.

I met him with only silence. I didn't want to believe magic had killed our child, because if I looked to magic then we would have to look to the dead Dark Lord. Maybe he did something to Valo's body so that he couldn't carry children? My father was going to just love that. Gandalf placed a knarled hand on my slumped shoulder with a sympathetic squeeze. I accepted and felt slightly better for his solid comfort.

"Nothing is for certain, Legolas. There could be something medically wrong. Let's not look to magic yet. This is all only assumption and conjecture at this point. We can't know what's really happening until I can examine Valo myself." Aragorn patted my back affectionately. No, he wouldn't let any harm come to Valo either. That child was like his own flesh and blood. Our moment of comfort was shattered however, when Arwen came rushing through the door with fright in her eyes. That one first glance she gave me told me more than enough. Something was very very wrong and it more than likely had to do with Valo. After all, when DIDN'T it?

"Valo is gone! I stepped out for a book and when I got back he was missing! I've searched everywhere I could think of-"

I didn't wait for her to finish. I was out that door and bolting down the halls before anyone else could take breath.

None of our searching turned up anything except a missing horse and his absent traveling cloak. It seemed my little husband had left. But why?

~Valokiloren~

I woke up with a jumble of thoughts crowding my foggy brain.

Our baby is gone and its all my fault. I abandoned Legolas. I abandoned US. 

There is no us. Its just you. He would have hated you. When he found out that you killed your baby, he would have killed you, or worst, LEFT you. Where would you be without him? You have no one else now. Where will you go now? You are nothing now. He's fashioned your life around him so you would never leave,never want to. You burned all of your other bridges. There is no one to care for you now.

Maybe he won't hate me too much? Maybe I was sick or something and that's what happened? Maybe I just wasn't strong enough? .

Either way, it was YOUR body, YOU have control now so it was YOUR fault.

It was never this way when HE was here. 

Yes, you had someone to blame then. Someone to run to and cry when things didn't go your way. Now you have no one.

I know... .

You could have him back, you know...He's alive in you. 

What? My Mast- Sauron still lives? . I have to tell Aragorn.

And be killed on sight? You murdered the heir to the Mirkwood throne. They would rather kill you on sight. He lives in you because you are as much of the Dark Lord as he is. You are him, remember? Nothing you can do, no new name you take can change that. We must not tell lies, Harry.

Don't call me that... What am I supposed to do now?

Leave it all to me.


	5. By Proxy

AN/ Okay so how is everyone liking the story so far? Leave a review and let me know!

Disclaimer: Nope. Don't sue.

Chapter Five~ By Proxy

~Valokiloren~

I was alone now and after a long night of weighing my options, I decided to travel for awhile. Maybe see the West sea or the Shire. Visit the Grey Havens and look out towards the Undying Lands. I could imagine almost being able to see Valinor. That was as close to the Valar as I would ever get. I would always be the Morgul abomination, the freak-child. Maybe the Valar could help me, though. They were typically silent to the troubles of Man unless it was something that would alter the course of Arda. So who could he go to for help? For answers.

'There is a place. It lies in the Ash Mountains, hidden in the shadow of Barad-dur. You know of where I speak.'

My heart grew cold at the thought. I did know of the place. Past the plains of Gorgoroth and the fallen tower of Barad-dur, buried in the mountains that bordered the breeding lands of the fell steeds. It was a place accessed only opened by blood and the sibilant language that I shared with my Master.

'The Keeper...she could help you. I could show you the way.'

I shouldn't. I know I shouldn't...but didn't I want to go to Barad-dur for answers anyways? Why not go to the one person alive who could end this guessing game for good? Because I could remember the Keeper. I knew when she'd been locked away in that darkness alone, forever. It had been she who had suggested the sleeping curse that had become my name sake. His most faithful...The emptiness I felt inside where my baby's beating heart once was, I could feel like a gaping wound. Why did I have to lose everything? Was it because I had done terrible things? Was this my just reward? To lose my baby and through that loss, lose Legolas for good too? I must have done something truly terrible in that world I came from to deserve this pain. Images of a dark man falling through a stone archway filled my mind. Maybe I'd killed him and that's why all of this was happening. I must have taken that man from his family in the worst way and now the Valar were taking mine. Perhaps the Keeper could tell me why.

'I will go.' I told that inner voice, unable to disguise my reluctance.

'Then first you must do something in return. Something your Master requires.'

I still just couldn't understand. It couldn't be, could it? Frodo had destroyed the One Ring!

' But I saw the Great Eye fall...'

I felt the voice's irritation as if it were my own. Maybe I was losing my mind for real this time.

'Did you really think the Eye was his only physical embodiment,you foolish boy? Now obey, child!' I cringed at the cold voice, the harsh grating on the inside of my being, 'You can't be alone. You don't know how to survive on your own. Without your Master, you will die, but if you return to him, he will reward you. He can give you a new baby.'

My mind filled with a combination if feelings surging within me all at once so that my very breath was stolen away. Loss and hope. Grief and want. Despair and desperation. If I had a new baby, I could show Legolas that I could be a good parent and that I wouldn't disappoint him anymore. But if the child weren't of his line...what would he say? He would be mad, say cruel things. He would leave again like he did at Isengard. But...I would have a baby. I wouldn't ever be alone again.

'What do I need to do?'

~Legolas~

"We're going after him." My voice was firm and resolute. I was not accepting any say on this otherwise.

My mate was out there and he was not in any shape for travel. Valo needed care that he just couldn't get when he was out, exposed to the elements. Especially alone. I wasn't sure Valo had ever been on his own. He had always said that during his time with the Dark Lord, he'd always been with the Nazgul or with Sauron himself. He had said he was never allowed out of their sight. So where would he go? He didn't know anyone else except the ones he'd left behind in Minas Tirith. Where would he go? That was what they had been pondering for the last few hours. They all stood around a map of Arda, rather unsuccessfully trying to pinpoint places where my mate may have gone. Aragorn stood staring at the map as if it held all of the mysteries of the Valar.

Where would my little one go when he was all alone in the world? Now that he had no ties to anyone? No one to ground him, hold him back...Something began to niggle at the back of my mind, some familiar memory. Something important.

' I wished to see if perhaps Legolas would allow me to go to Mordor to look for some clue to my past. Perhaps in Barad-Dur there would be something-'

Of course. Why hadn't I thought of that before? It seemed that this would forever characterize our relationship. Valo silently trying to tell me something and me not listening until it was too late.

"Mordor."

The word brought the chatter around me to a stop. Aragorn looked up at me with a frown. For some reason, I suddenly felt ashamed for refusing Valo's request to travel to that cursed place. It was such a simple thing. Barad-dur had been purged, the monument crumbled and the orcs spread to the far corners. There was nothing to fear there, but fear it I did. Something about subjecting my mate to that evil place, those lingering memories, stirred something terrifying inside me. I feared him being there more than anything. As if, by going back, Valo would be snatched from me and spirited to some place I could not follow. Every eye in the room was on me and I stirred back to myself.

"He asked me before we left if we could go there. He though maybe he could find some clue to his memories there...but I told him no."

Gandalf was puffing on his pipe in contemplation, eyeing me down as if I were a wayward youngling again.

"Then that is where we will start. With a little luck, we can still catch his trail." The King whispered, looking over the map with a sharper eye and a heading to seek out.

"If Valo did not fly by air then he may not have the strength to do so. He is still weak from the miscarriage, maybe even ill. It will be much easier to track a horse than a flying broom." Gandalf finally inserted his opinion gruffly.

I gave him a nod. Just as before, we were preparing to undertake one more journey. For now, at least, the Fellowship was reassembling.

~Valokiloren~

A smoky, red monstrosity of a machine floated by without a sound. A train, I recalled. I was back in that special place. The smoke cleared away along with the steam engine to reveal the person I sought on the other side of the track. Tom was basking in a cloud of clove smoke again though this time he was seated on the stone platform. There was no blood this time but there was a weariness to him that I hadn't seen before. He seemed almost crouched in on himself, curled up at his edges. He tried to appear as if it weren't the case, lounging nonchalantly but I could see the pinched look about him, the corners of his mouth and eyes tighter. There was no blood this time, only the weariness that seemed to smother him.

"Hello Harry." Tom said simply, his voice lacking his usual drawl. 

I tilted my head, coming to sit next to him.

"That was my name in the other place. Harry."

A memory came, flowing to me like water in a brook. The voice echoed out across the platform.

'Your a wizard, Harry.'

Tom gave me a bittersweet smile, both amusement and angry resignation. It hurt me to see such an expression on his face. Something was very wrong with Tom and somehow I knew that there wasn't anyway that I could help him. This was beyond me. 

'Worry not, Valo. You're right, this is beyond you, but I'm not in much pain.'

I leaned my head on his shoulder, suddenly feeling the weight of my guilt crush me. This was somehow my fault. Just like losing the baby. I rubbed my flat belly, a keening whine trying to scrape and crawl up my throat. It felt as if someone had stolen the very life from my heart. As if my soul had bled out onto the bed sheets with my child. 

' Now none of that, child. You need to be strong. You're going to be on your own soon enough. You need to be able to stand on your own.' Tom whispered, looking down at me with hazel eyes. 

I noticed tiny flecks of red intermixed with the brown, so minute that I chalked it up to a trick of the light. 

'How?' I hated how my voice trembled. My Master would have loved it.

Tom took a heavy drag off of his cigarette and gave me a look that could reinforce steel. A look that help me to build a stone wall around my heart to protect myself from the heartbreak, the pain.

'You remember all of the ones who matter most, even the ones you can't remember right now. You had people who loved you in that world. You may not be able to remember them but one day you will and thats what you have to hold onto.'

I recalled the image of a girl with bushy hair and a tall lanky teenager with red hair that had come to me in Rohan during the last Great War. These must have been the people who loved me. Siblings? Friends. I nodded to him, my lips pursed and trembling. Remember the people who mattered most. They may not be here in Arda but they were in here with me. I carried them with me even now, even though their memories had been brutally torn away from me. They were here inside me, shaping who I was. 

'I think I've started to remember them already...'

~»|«~

The path I travelled was a hard one to take. The voice told me to stay off of the paths and roads so Aragorn couldn't track me, even if they had felt the need to follow me. Maybe they hadn't. Maybe they thought I was as big a mistake as I did. My horse whinnied lightly as I continued at a quick pace, the voice urging me on faster and faster.

'Find it, find it, find it! Find it and please your Master. Find it and get a new child.'

I pushed magic into my mare, her speed increasing as we crossed the Lossarnach. I followed the Anduin down past Erui. At this pace, I would reach the Poros Delta in no time at all.


	6. From the Deepest Desires Often Come the Deadliest Hate

A/N: Thanks so much for all of your great reviews! They've really given me the kick start I need to start writing again and just so all of you know, because I know this was on everyone's mind while I was away, I will NEVER give up on a story! I have a very strict policy on that. Even if I have to completely restart a story from an entirely different angle, I will never just abandon it :p

Disclaimer: Nada. ALSO! The idea for the Black Library isn't mine. I actually found it on a website that has a very cool interactive map of Middle Earth.

Chapter Six- From the Deepest Desires Often Come the Deadliest Hate

It was dark as pitch when I came to the Poros delta. Even in the middle of the night, I could see the trail of the river going on, on, on. It was almost like I could just follow that river out past Tolfolas, into the sea and leave everything else behind. Maybe if I were to reach the end of the world, I would somehow magically find myself back in that world where I came from. Was there ever any hope of going back? The bigger question was, did I want to? If I somehow could go back to that place, would those people still be there? Would they accept me as I am, as Valo not as Harry Potter? While we may be the same body and spirit, Harry Potter and I were not the same person. They wouldn't know me. They wouldn't be able to accept that the person they had loved so long ago was gone, only to be replaced with this stranger. Two different worlds for two different people.

'You belong here with your Master, not with them. You belong to him.'

It was right, I knew that. Even the insanity inside me, if that's what the voice even stemmed from, acknowledged that fact. I wasn't meant for good things or lovely people. I had been borne here in darkness and in doubt, for the soul purpose of being a key to my Master's long life. I wouldn't find anything in the dark. My search would have to commence at first light. I didn't dare tarry any longer than that.

~`='~

"So what exactly am I?"

Tom and I were sitting on the edge of the platform. I was starting to remember small things now. I remembered that this was a train station and that it was called 9 and ¾ though I didn't know why anyone would name a place like this after a number or where it lead to. I could see the apparition of my child self running between the pillars in the mists, never a good look but enough. The soft echoing giggles and whispers bounced off of the stone around us and into space every so often. It was eerie. Tom took a long drag off of his cigarette, the thin dark stick seemingly the only thing holding him together. The young man was looking more haggard and exhausted than ever. I couldn't help but think back to his words to me not so long ago. Tom had said he wouldn't always be here for me. Was that time coming sooner rather than later? Why? How? 

"What do you know so far?" He asked me softly, his voice tight.

It hurt me to listen to him sounding so…beaten down. This was my strong Tom, my confidante and friend. Who was hurting him to make him like this? Was he sick? Was I sick and by proxy, so was Tom? The questions were just as terrified as the answers. 

"I know that somehow, I'm the key to my Master's long life. That I'm a vessel for him and that I'm his connection to the physical world. I don't know why or how though." My explanation didn't seem to either surprise or disappoint him.

"You are still his connection to the physical realm. It began in the other place long ago, when you were still just an infant. There is a piece of his soul inside you that became one with you over the long Ages. That is what I am. I am that bonded soul piece. That is why he can invade your body. Whenever the Dark Lord's physical body dies, as long as he has his soul pieces, he can come back to physical form. As long as his soul pieces survive, so will Sauron."

Tom was careful not to look at me and I wasn't about to call him out on it. This was…a lot to take in, but I suppose it wasn't anything that I hadn't, in a way, known before. I was just getting the specifics now. I was only glad that someone was willing to give me some sort of answers now. 

"I can't give you more than that, regrettably. I can only tell you things that I witnessed myself. I don't know anything that happened in the world after I was created. Now that his other soul piece was destroyed in the destruction of the One Ring, Sauron will look to you as a vessel."

Again, not terribly surprising. I had been possessed by my Master before after Helm's Deep and at the final battle at the Black Gate. I still had the scar from where Legolas's arrow had jutted from my flesh. It made sense that Tom would only know some things and not others. The Dark Lord had been much younger when he had been created after all. Ages had passed just in this world since he had been created and who knew how long had passed in the Otherworld before they had come to Arda. 

"Gandalf says I'm an Istari or some sort of magic wielder. I've done magic before and seen Master do it as well." I ignored Tom's sneer at my title for the Dark Lord and I knew he understood that my statement was more of a question than anything.

He sighed heavily around his cigarette, finally narrowing me with a dark gaze.

"We're wizards and, before, we came from the Wizarding World. It isn't in this realm, you're right about that. You're memory loss is likely a spell. Over the centuries, we've adapted to no longer needing wands like regular wizards do but you still need to know the spells to channel it." He explained, using his cigarette to gesture as he spoke. He seemed so tired…

I thought back to spells I may have used and the journey to Helm's Deep came to my mind first and foremost. Sectumsempra. Avada Kedavra. Expelliarmus. Reducto. Spells. That's what those strange words were. It was so clear to me now. A wizard. I was a wizard.

'How could you not be, my dratted sister being what she was? Oh, she got a letter just like that and disappeared off to that ... that school - and came home every holiday with her pockets full of frog-spawn, turning tea-cups into rats. I was the only one who saw her for what she was ... a freak! But for my mother and father, oh no, it was Lily this and Lily that, they were proud of having a witch in the family!'

The woman's voice in my mind sounded angry, filled with hate. Were they related? Surely not. Wasn't family supposed to love one another? Lily. Lily. Lily. It was a beautiful name. A flower. Not anything like the name Harry. But Lily had to be related to me, otherwise, why would the angry woman make the connection between us?

'Let go. Sweetheart, you're ready. Let go... LET GO!'

My mother. She was my mother. Finally, I had a name to match with the face. For the first time since the visions had begun, I could name someone from before. Lily. Lily Potter. Her smiling face danced in my mind and the love in her voice brought tears to my eyes.

"I'm starting to remember, Tom." I choked, tearfully, "My mother…her name was Lily, wasn't it? I can remember her face…"

He squeezed my shoulder in an attempt to comfort me, but I wasn't sad. I was happy. I had been loved. I had proof now. I had drawn her face in Minas Tirith and now I had a name. Such a beautiful name…I think I'll name my baby after her. The thought brought my purpose back to the forefront of my mind. I had to complete my mission before I could have a baby. And for that I had to wake up.

-`'-

The dirt and sod had grown thick over the centuries. It took a good portion of my magic, Tom giving advice along the way, to break through it. The delta was filled with the smells of fertile earth, water and growth. I could stay in a place like this for a long time. It was so peaceful here.

'Here. Here. Try here.' The voice urged.

I had come to realize that there were two voices I had to contend with. Tom, who I always spoke to at the train station except when I was in extreme danger, like when he had spoken to me at Isengard. Then there was the other. We had guessed that it was perhaps the little bit of Sauron's soul struggling to stay alive after the Ring's destruction. It was the more cruel of the two but it gave me hope that I would have my baby after all. Once my Master began regaining strength of his own, he wouldn't need to grip onto my soul in order to survive. Then I could have a new baby.

"Point me." I whispered and I felt the pull on my center of gravity once more, urging me just a few steps to the left of where I stood only a few meters away from the water's edge. Here. It was here, I could feel the magic rolling off of it even from its place buried under silt and earth, "Reducto."

The ground exploded with the force of my spell, sending dirt and debris covering me from head to toe. Maybe not my best idea, I decided as I rubbed dirt out of my eyes.

'Foolish child.'

I fought the eye roll that threatened to overcome me. Instead, I climbed down into the pit the magical assault had made. Would it work? Tom had said it may not. Everyone had thought that it would never be found. I suppose they'd never had a wizard with the voice in his head look for it. Then again, there probably weren't many half-possessed wizards running around. I sighed, leveling my hand at the ground. It was now or never. No time to waste.

"Accio!"

I nearly sank to my knees with surprise when…it worked. With a long sucking sound, the orb jerked from the mire to land in my hand. It's glassy surface was coated with muck and dirt but even from beneath the mud, anyone would be able to tell what it was. The Osgiliath Palantir. It had been lost since the Kin-Strife. The voice had said that it would have been pushed downstream and through some sort of calculations that I neither knew nor understood, he determined that it would have ended up at the delta or further south. It was pure, unadulterated luck that allowed me to find it without going all the way down to the Ethir Anduin.

'Can you believe our luck? Of all the trees we could've hit, he had to get one that hits back.'

The memory-voice sounded incredulous and I couldn't stop the grin that slid onto my face at the sound. Apparently, I had a wealth of random luck. Trees that hit back? What a strange world I must have come from. I wasn't sure why my Master wanted the Palantir but maybe Tom had an idea. I would have to ask him later. For now, I needed to get back on the road. It was a long way to the Hidden Vale and the Ered Lithui that made up the northern border of Mordor.


	7. What Lies Within

A/N: So many good reviews...a few not so great ones but as long as I've been writing I have tougher skin than that :p In any case, here's a new chapters for all of you loyalists out there because without the reviews you guys write for me, I probably would've gone another six months without an update. See warnings for the story if you take issue with m-preg.

Disclaimer:7 I own a dog named Mercy with one eye and no balls but I certaintly don't own Hp or LotR.

Chapter Seven-What Lies Within

Dreamscape

Valo gasped in delight, his stomach seeming to curl like a spring inside him. Hands roamed down his body, playing his nerves like a finely tuned instrument. A hand stroked down his bare back with nails that left sharp trails along his skin. Valo gasped at the sensation. His Master was pain and pleasure wrapped into one dominating package. The sound of the snake speech whispered from above him. 

' I always reward my good lovely. I am always good to my lovely when he is good to me. You want to be good to me, don't you, darling? You want to please me, don't you?' 

Valo's entire form was shaking, convulsing as he laid himself bare for another's desire. His voice shook as he gave the response he knew that the Dark Lord wished. 

"Yes, Master..." 

Sauron's smoky form tilted it's cloaked head and Valo could practically feel the smirk from beneath his cowl. 

"Or perhaps you'd prefer something...different." 

Before his very eyes, Valo watched the Dark Lord morph into the image of Tom Riddle. Emerald eyes widened to the size of plates. Tom? This was...certainly different. He shied away when the image of Tom reached for him. It was too weird. Tom was his best friend, they couldn't be TOGETHER. Tom's face scowled with annoyance bordering on anger. Valo did not want to see his Master angry again. Instead Tom leaned down to nuzzle along the column of Valo's throat with a strange sounding chuckle.

'Oh my precious one. It's not this form you want though is it? It isn't me you've been dreaming of at night...but no matter. Soon it'll be only me.'

His Master pulled back and Valo was met with the image of his beloved Legolas staring back at whole world suddenly narrowed, his breath catching in his throat at the sight. His pulse started racing but then the pain began. The pain of failure and longing. Valo felt his bottom lip begin to tremble. This was more cruel than anything his Master could have ever done and he knew that the Dark Lord knew it. That's why he'd done it. He knew that the sight of Legolas would hurt him deeper than anything else that Sauron could have done. But it was so tempting, so easy to take the illusion for pay and accept the chance to touch his bond-mate again. It was a terrible weight on his heart to pull away and let Legolas go. For now.

" Please don't...Please just come as you are. I'd prefer the truth of you than pretty lies..."

His husband's face twisted into a sadistic smile before the illusion fell away leaving the Dark Lord in its wake.

"Good boy.." 

His mouth descended once again, his hands travelling southward. Valo gritted his teeth against what he knew what was to come, holding onto the knowledge that his reward would only come from it. 

~»»»(¤)«««~

"By the Morning Star, what happened here?"

Aragorn's eyes narrowed at the sight of a pit in the ground. It looked like the earth had exploded from the inside. It brought to mind the incident in the Mines of Moria at the Door so long ago. Valo had done something that looked similar.

"Magic. We've seen it before. The question is, what was it used for?" Gandalf finally inserted gruffly.

Legolas knelt at the edge of the pit and looked down into the opening. His frown gave tell that even in this strange scene, something wasn't quite as it should be.

"Something was here. See the round place cut out of the earth? Something smooth and round." He told them calmly.

"Something that was best remaining hidden." The Maiar exclaimed, his own wizened face pulled into a dark expression.

Aragorn looked to Gandalf for further explanation but the wizard offered none. Whatever Valo had unearthed was something that Gandalf clearly believed that no one should have knowledge of. It turned his stomach cold to think of his child actively seeking something dangerous. After all, if Gandalf had reacted this way, it had to be something either dark, dangerous or a mixture of the two. What had Valo gotten himself into? What had he done?

"We ride to the east, following the river. That's where his tracks lead. He's likely following the river to the Ephel Duath crossing into Mordor and then up north along the foothills of the mountains for a time. It seems the likeliest approach." Aragorn directed them, bringing them back to the task at hand, "Let us hope he doesn't venture too near to the Nan Ungol. I've heard tales of the terrors that lie there. Spiders the size of Wargs, the damned offspring of Cirith Ungol."

Legolas looked toward the east at the very thought. If Valo strayed too far south, he could end up as a sad tragedy of the dark monsters that inhabited his home land. Would his bond-mate know of the dangers that lurked there? Would he know about it from living in Mordor for so long? He prayed to the Valar that it was the case.

~»»»``(¤)``«««~

The journey was becoming a tire on me already, the mountain range being the most exhausting of all. My Master had sent me no nightmares recently. I believe he was pleased with me. The reason turned my stomach but what I had said was as true now as it was then. I would rather him come to me in darkness and cruelty than disguise himself as the man I loved and twist my love for Legolas into something grotesque and unrecognizable. As the days went on though, I started to notice a change. I was getting queasy. My relief at being over the range was dampened by my throwing up, hunched over my horse. I wiped the sweat off of my brow in frustration. Was this morning sickness or had I contracted some sort of illness? My heart leap at the idea of being pregnant again but I refused to let myself get excited until I knew for sure. I'd have to ask Tom tonight. Perhaps he would know. Even thought I knew they probably wouldn't answer, I sent up a silent prayer to the Valar. If I was pregnant...I wouldn't ever be alone again. I could show Legolas that I could give him heirs and that I wouldn't hurt our babies again. I could prove to him that I was worth something after all. My being sick posed a whole different set of issues. It could hinder my journey, making getting to the Hidden Vale next to impossible. What a disaster that would be.

'There's no time to waste. You must get going now.'

I heaved a heavy sigh and urged Sinai forward. She whinnied at the motion but pushed on nonetheless. I would have to stop once I got past the Morigost outpost. Sinai would likely not survive the journey through South GorGor, south of Orodruin. The lava pits and ash that oozed from Mount Doom would end her. I would have to pick up a Morgul steed at the outpost, a breed far more suited to Mordor's hazardous environment. In the meantime, I had a ways to go until then and plenty of good feeding ground for her to enjoy until that time. The ash from Orodruin fell this far out and, instead of smothering the earth like it did towards the north, made the ground fertile and fresh. It would be a nice place to set her free when the time came. She was the last piece of the life i'd just left. I wanted to put her somewhere safe and clean, somewhere nice. The idea of letting her go felt like losing my baby all over again. It was silly, completely illogical to feel so sad over losing an animal. An animal was no comparison to a human child but grief isn't always logical. Sometimes, you feel a certain way, not because it makes sense but because your heart tells you to. Sometimes, the heart needs that grief in order to go on. Sometimes we needed to hurt and cry even though the ones we loved have been gone a long time. Even if the reason for our hurt has long past.

I continued up through the plain, letting myself feel the hurt, because some days, all I wanted was to not have to pretend to be happy.

««««~(¤)~»»»»

"There is life there." Tom admitted to me, though he did not appear as excited as I felt.

A baby? I was having a baby! This was my second chance! My chance to do things over again and do them better. I would make sure nothing hurt my child this time, not even me. Everything was going to be perfect this time! I couldn't prevent an enormous, ridiculous grin from splitting my face wide open. 

"Tom, it happened! A baby! I'm having another baby!" I practically danced around the platform, holding my stomach joyfully.

He gave me a half hearted smile, putting out the cigarette in his elegant hand.

"Congratulations are in order, I suppose, but I do need you to listen to me on this, Valo." I stopped spinning in circles long enough to listen obediently, " I want you to approach this with caution, okay? Sure, it seems like this is one great blessing but I know myself. He will want something in return. What he did is no small form of magic. He would have had to have planted the seed inside you long ago for you to be with child now. I think he planned this."

My stomach dropped and I clutched my arms around my belly protectively. Planted? Tom's face was grim and he stood up with some effort to walk towards me. Be was getting more and more tired now and it could have just been my overworked imagination but I thought that every so often his outline would waver as if he weren't completely here with me. As if he were half some place else. He squeezed my shoulder which only made me more nervous. People never gave comfort when good things were happening. 

"Its possible that it was the planted seed that caused you to miscarry." I felt my body go cold. How...could he say such a thing? "If the Dark Lord planted it long ago, like I believe, he could have used it to essentially push your child out of the way. Eliminating competition, so to speak." 

Stop it. Stop it, I didn't want to hear anymore! My baby is not a killer! If it was anyone's fault my child is dead, it was mine! Tom must have seen the panic in my eyes and my silent turmoil. The fog around me had begun to roil and churn at my distress. He interjected perhaps in an attempt to calm me but the damage had been done. The seeds of doubt had been placed.

"But this is only suspicion, it isn't a fact. We can't ever really know for sure..."

I sat down, all previous joy gone. The words wouldn't stop bouncing around my skull like demented children's toys. What was I suppose to do now? Nothing, I decided. Nothing was wrong with my baby, nothing at all. I would not hear otherwise. My baby wasn't a monster. This child was the only good thing I'd ever done in my life and I wasn't going to let anyone put it down like they put me down. My baby would be born without the taint of me or the Dark Lord. It would be a baby that Legolas wouldbe proud to show his father and all of the others. My baby would have a place in this world even if I couldn't. No one would hurt them, I swore it. Tom nudged me in a lukewarm attempt at playful cheek.

"You'll have to start taking care of yourself and the baby now. No more skipping meals. Also, there's an herb that can help you. It'll offer you the extra nutrition that your child needs and boost your own body's natural defenses since you'll be on the road for some time."

"That would be wonderful, Tom."


	8. No matter how many deaths that I die I will never forget.

A/N: Hey hey all! Lol so I toyed with the idea of saying I wouldn't put out the next chapter until I got such and such number of reviews on this story but I felt kinda wrong about it. It felt like I was punishing you guys in a way, and that's not the reason why I started this story. When you're feeling really bogged down it's hard to remember why you started a story in the first place, but I started writing this story in particular because I enjoyed it and because I wanted to bring that enjoyment to other people. So on that, here's the next chapter and enjoy! Next two chapter titles are from Hurricane by 30 Seconds to Mars.

*The interactive map I use is called "the land of shadow . com". It's very cool!

Disclaimer: FREEDOOOOOOMMMMMM!

Chapter Eight- No matter how many deaths that I die I will never forget.

Dreamscape

The ground was a thin pool of water. Everything was dark around him but for a small beam of light coming from somewhere up above. His eyes traced it downward and landed on an inescapable sight. His sweet Valo, looking healthy with his hair down and eyes shining, holding a beautiful baby girl. Even from the distance at which he stood, he could see the elven ears peeking out from beneath light colored locks. The sight of the small parent looking so pleased was an image that warmed his heart. It'd been so long since Valo had looked so at peace. Valo was looking down at the child in his arms like it were the only thing he would ever see. Emerald eyes looked up at him only to force the man back in horror when he saw, not emerald, but flaming orange staring back at him. The usually kind face before him twisted into something malicious, full of a hateful snarl. Valo's grip on the child tightened and soon his hands were around the girl's neck, squeezing. The babe's shrill scream was silenced by a choke. Valo! No. Sauron! Sauron would kill the child! He would kill Valo's baby! Amidst his panic, he barely felt himself notch an arrow until it was let loosed, flying through the air until it hit its target in the chest. The child fell from clawed hands, falling to the puddle below. The arrow was sticking out of Valo's thin chest and as the flames died out of his eyes, emerald returned to appear confused and in pain. His entire body began to shake as the wound poured blood, far too much for one human body to hold it seemed. He shot him…He'd shot him. The image was so much like the last battle that it shook him to his core. The familiar guilty arrow sticking from his poor little one's chest was a blight on his soul. This had to be some punishment. Something was making sure that he never forgot that terrible thing he'd done, that wrong that haunted him to this day. Would he never be free of the memory? Valo opened his mouth to scream but instead of sound, thick noxious black sludge poured out. It was just as when they had first met in Imladris when he had threatened to put an arrow through Valo. After he had saved Frodo…The small body fell to the ground, the water tainted black and red beneath him. The babe was still and cold beneath his hands and his beloved's eyes were blank and lifeless, the viridian color faded to a dull grey. He'd lost them both…all over again.

Legolas shot out of his sleep pallet with a choking gasp, his chest heaving for breath. Not again…every time he closed his eyes he relived the loss of his child and all of the times Valo had been hurt by his hand. His attack on the Morgul young one featured prominently in his dreams. A sound at his side had him jerking his sword from it's sheath. Aragorn sat at his side beside their dying campfire. The Ranger was unperturbed by the weapon in his hand. Aragorn trusted him…just like Valo had.

"Bad dream again?"

Legolas collapsed to a seat beside him and looked out into the Mordor night. It was hard to imagine a place like this could be in a land as dark and desolate as the Black Lands. The plain they had found their little Fellowship overnighting in was a surprisingly grassy field. In the distance, wild Mumakil roamed without master or tether, brought by the Haradrim for use during the War of the Ring and abandoned when Orodruin erupted and the Dark Lord fell. He could see their great hulking shapes against the moonlight that peaked occasionally through the ever present clouds above.

"He strangled the baby…and I shot him. Again. It was just like in the battle at the Black Gate. He looked so betrayed, Elessar…"

The King squeezed his friends shoulder in an attempt at comfort. What could he say? What could he give Legolas to console him? Pretty lies and vain consolations? The Mirkwood elf would only grow embittered at such things. No, he loved him enough to say nothing. He loved them both enough to bow to the silent brooding between them.

~`(+)'~

Valo made another step towards the dark heart of Mirkwood, leaning heavily against a tree for support as another spear of pain lanced through his abdomen. He bit his lip to stifle a cry, clutching his swollen belly in agony. It was a terrible pain but one he had to bear. Pain or not, he had to care for his child. It wasn't the child's fault that he was in pain. It wasn't his baby's fault that he was ill. His Master had promised him a baby if he found the Osgiliath Palantir. Sauron had promised that he would have a child and sure enough, here he was, traipsing through the Raven Vale, his belly swelling with life more every day. Would his baby be the same as it would have been with Legolas? Had his husband remarried? Was he missing him at all? He was almost afraid to know. Legolas would hate him for this betrayal. Valo was just so desperate to somehow make up for losing their child...he hoped that Legolas may accept another baby since their own hadn't made it. Sure, it wouldn't be their blood per se but it wasn't a chore to love a lonely child, right? It certainly wasn't for him, no matter the pain he may be in. After all, Estel and Lady Arwen had adopted him, right?

~`(+)'~

Aragorn was reminded strongly of the Fellowship during the War of the Ring which ended only a few short years ago. Valo, he recalled, had never taken to the peace like the rest of them had. He had grown restless and pensive as if forever waiting for something to happen. He had noticed the quiet around the  
young Morgul child and wondered at its cause. It seemed as if some terrible weight was lingering unseen about Valo's small, vulnerable frame. The reason for his flight was still a mystery but they were slowly piecing clues together. They had tracked the child into the barren, volcanic Mordor wastelands and again back through along the borders of Gondor. What was his end result? Where was his ward going? A deeper question hurt his heart to wonder but wonder he did: Was all of this at its root because of Valo's miscarriage? He spared a glance at his longtime friend, his heart going out to Legolas. The poor elf seemed completely at a loss. His countenance seemed to grow heavier with despair every day that his beloved was not found, the terrible nightmares dragging him down further. Aragorn wasn't sure how to comfort him, except to spur them on ever harder. There was something else too. As they tracked Valo throughout the Black Lands, he was finding more and more Aiethica herb at the used campsites. It baffled him completely but it was apparent that Valo was consuming it. It was that knowledge that worried the King. Aiethica was only used during pregnancy. But how could that be possible? He knew from Legolas's confidence that neither he nor Valo had had the heart or been in any condition for intimacy since they lost the baby. Was Valo so far gone in his grief that he believed his baby still lived? Then there was that horrible option...infidelity? But who would Valo have an affair with? He knew no one else. The only ones the Mordorian had known were those of the Fellowship, the deceased and defeated Dark Lord and his Keeper, the Witch King. So what was happening with their young friend? No doubt that Legolas's own thoughts were darker still. He had not been the only one taking careful note of the Aiethica herb.

`(+)'

There it was. The Barad-en-hen. It was a stone doorway placed back deep within a crevice in the Ash Mountains. It was a large circular door, made of black stone that gleamed in the red light that dominated the northern plains of Mordor. Engravings of snakes poised to strike shone life-like against the obsidian, curled into one tangled nest. Very life-like, actually. One of the snakes blinked its black eyes before starting to move. It's long sinuous body uncurled from the mass of its waking brethren, unfolding to get an eye to eye look at their disrupter. The sibilant language that my Master and I shared spilled forth from its lips.

'Ahh, young massster. We wondered when you would return to ussss.'

The serpents greeting seemed to rouse the other serpents for he was met with many hissed greetings.

'The young master is here!'

'The Master?'

'No, the young Master, you dim-witted rock eater!'

'The Sleeping One?'

'Young Master!'

Another slender form disentangled itself from the shifting nest.

'Valokiloren. You wish to enter the Inner Circle?'

The phrase brought to mind the image of men and women, cloaked in black, standing before my Master. Lucius was there, I knew, though I could not distinguish between each form.

"I do."

The serpent that greeted me first, their King, I assumed, gave a hiss of amusement.

'Then Speak and give us an offering, Sleeping One, and enter.'

My hand was shaking as I reached out my bare arm. It wasn't that I feared the offering itself. I feared what I would find out when I did enter. This was the point of no return. No matter how many times I gave in to the Dark Lord, this was the point at which things would never be able to go back to the way they were. Would I be changed when I knew the truth? What terrible sins had I committed in my past life to deserve this life I lived now? This loveless, faithless, accursed life…Each serpent struck out fast as lightning, burying their fangs deep into my arm. Pain lanced up through my skin, lighting my brain on fire. Blood ran in rivulets down the sides of my arm, the serpents tasting my blood vigorously. Their eyes flashed red for a moment before they relinquished me at last. I'd forgotten how much that hurt. The last I was in the Hidden Vale, my Master opened this door. I gulped down the pain and spoke in order to appease the guardians and grant me entrance.

'Morsmordre.'

They hissed in assent and slid back into the nest slowly. With a burst of dust, the entire door popped out of the mountain before it began to turn as if on some inner axis with a grating sound that echoed obscenely throughout the divide. The heavy door began to swing open slowly and darkness awaited me. Only darkness that heavy could shake me to my very core. Whatever happened from this moment on…I clutched my belly protectively. Whatever happened from this moment on, I would never forget how I loved and how I was loved in turn.


	9. No matter how many lives that I live I will never regret

A/N: Okaaayyy, sorry this is out a bit later than expected everyone. I've been working on an original story at nights from 8 to 6am lol. My co-author and I are really making leaps and bounds with it though. ;) My nights are brimming with character creation, plot nuances, map drawing and concept art. It's enough to make your head spin! Lol We may make it into a manga or graphic novel so if anyone draws comic book strips then send me a PM!

Disclaimer: Nada.

Chapter Nine- No matter how many lives that I live I will never regret.

The darkness inside the cavern was oppressive. It hung around like a miasma, clinging and dripping off of the very stalactites themselves. It was an unnatural sort of darkness. It felt oily to step into as if, at any moment, it would turn and choke the life right out of you. I could not explain the terror I felt at the prospect of entering that doorway. I felt the very darkness beckoning me inside, like it had been awaiting my arrival for centuries, as the serpent had said. I knew that once I entered, I would not emerge the same person that I went in, if I emerged at all. I feared the concept even more because of this knowledge. Yet enter I did. The smell of dampness, earth and dark magic assaulted my senses. It brought to my mind's eye the image of a graveyard, the body of a young man lying nearby.

'Cedric…Take my body back will you? Back to my parents...'

'Let go. Sweetheart, you're ready. Let go... LET GO!'

The cry startled me from the memory and I pushed it away as if it were some slimy noisome thing. This was not the time or the place to get caught up in such things. I needed all of my wits about me. I pushed through it and continued on. My path was lit by small, hovering blue ghost lights that gave off whispers as I passed. All were captured souls of those who had sought out this place for selfish gains or in order to purge this Middle Earth of the Shadow's influence for good. None had come as far as the Door and all had failed. The ghost lights cast an eerie glow over the encroaching blackness, twinkling out in the vast cavern like a great ocean of stars. It would've been beautiful in another place and time. I followed the path, bewaring the whispers from the souls. They were in place to lead anyone unfortunate enough to get past the Door, astray. The cave was so large that one couldn't tell where the edges of room were. Had they carved out and hollowed the entire mountain? Incredible! The path was smooth like glass save for the incomprehensible patterns carved into its wet surface.

Runes. I recognized them, though I didn't know their meaning. They mirrored the black language tattooed on my own flesh. I rubbed the backs of my hands self-consciously, very aware of the marks there. They had appeared again after I lost the baby and had stubbornly refused to fade over the last few months. Perhaps the Keeper could decipher them as well. Maybe they would shed some light on more of my dark purpose. The Palantir was a solid weight on my hip as I walked. The further into the mountain I travelled, the less frequent the voices of the dead became and the more I started to hear another voice entirely. It began soft, like a breeze through the leaves of a tree at the cusp of winter. The closer I came to the Inner Circle, the harsher it grew.

'Come away, little lion…come to me now…'

It was eerie. The voice scraped across the brain like sand in storm. The closer to the Inner Circle I came, the more insistent it became and the more my hands began to shake with unconcealed anxiety. The darkness pressed down on me and I thought, through a haze, that I felt tendrils, like fingers, begin to touch feather-light along my skin to snag my clothes. They were reaching, reaching, reaching…as if they could grab the innermost part of me, pull out the darkness inside and leaving me pure and unsoiled by the stain of Sauron. Wouldn't that be a blessing? A blessing too kind, too perfect for a twisted little thing like me. My baby would be perfect though. Untouched by my darkness and sins, by my possession. The voice was cackling by now. I don't know what made me reach out for it but in the midst of my fear, I found my hand gripped around the emerald stone that the fair Lady of Caras Ghaladon had given me. Lady Galadriel had never said what the necklace would do but had given it kindly. For some time, I suspected that she had given it to me simply because she had bestowed great gifts on the rest of the Fellowship and didn't want me left out. Now, however, I was starting to doubt that she had no purpose behind it.

The moment my hand grasped the smooth surface, it began to glow a soft green and the fingers fell away with a hiss as if startled by its purity. All I could do was stare at its beauty. It was so brilliant in its goodness. Something in my heart clenched and I felt tears well up in my eyes. Someone had offered me this small light in the dark. Someone had cared enough to offer me a small beam of comfort and hope, even knowing that I would fall.

'Help will always be given at Hogwarts, Harry, to those who ask for it.'

That's right…I had been loved. At some point in the past, someone had loved me. My mother had loved me. I had had parents. Friends. I didn't know where they were or how we'd been separated, all I knew was that I was here now and they weren't with me. I needed answers. I deserved answers.

"Come in, Valokiloren."

The voice that sounded from the cavern bounced around the rock, though there was no mistaking its origin now. It hailed from a stone door before him, sounding as if the demon had spent the last thousand years gurgling hot mortar. It was a sound that brought steaming blood and agonizing pain to mind. The door cracked open at the slightest whisper of a touch and I entered the dimly light room beyond. In the shadow, I stepped into the rest of my life.

The Inner Circle was as I remembered it. Stone arches were draped with the skins and sheddings of serpents, great and small. A great circle was carved into the center of the room, surrounded by tables of ancient tomes and strange instruments alike. Peeking out from beneath a hulking, curling metal throne was a noisome skull, the bottom half of its jaw on the top of a shelf of bottled ingredients across the room. The room contained a musk that was part aged parchment, ink, mold and old blood. A cauldron was tipped over in a shadowy corner, crusted with some thick black substance that stained the floor, however, the most eerie part of the entire room was the occupant within it. If the Mouth of Sauron had been twisted beyond recognition, then the Keeper had been broken and mutilated by the dark magic the Dark Lord had fed into them. She was a stooped figure, painfully thin and stretched tall in her tight, greyed skin. Her flesh resembled a corpse left to rot in the damp, her hair, once a lovely black, was matted and hung in limp straggled strands that blended with the tattered robe she wore. Her face was shadowed by a hood of bone and flesh that extended up her face, as scarred and twisted as the rest of her skin, ripped, chipped and torn at its edges. Her hands, supporting an opened tome, were long, with an extra joint in the fingers that gave them the look of being a separate creature all together when they bent. Protruding from the depths of her head were four tentacles that hung down as if they were part of her hair, yet each held a single, blinking eye that gave the Keeper constant 360 degree vision at all times. She was a monster…yet, I was more a monster than she could ever be. I was a monster disguised as an innocent. My sins weren't reflected on my outsides which made me the more deadly of us all.

"It's rude to stare, child. I'm sure our great Lord taught you that." The grin she leveled me with was full of blackened, sharp teeth.

I gave her nothing but an empty stare. She didn't deserve any groveling and neither did she want it. Her face contained no eyes, only scars, but the eyes hanging down by her waist all turned as one to survey me. She must have seen something that pleased her for her grim smile widened impossibly until her teeth were in danger of splitting the foul flesh.

"You are with our Lord's seed. Good. Everything is progressing as it should. Good." She bit off the word with a shrieking cackle that managed to somehow sound vaguely childish. She was more than a little mad. Weren't we all?

"What is progressing? I came here for answers, Bellatrix! What did he do to me? Where am I from? Who was my family? What happened to them?" I burst out all of these things at once. She hissed at the sound of her name, baring her rotted teeth menacingly.

"So many questions, little Boy Savior. You always were an irritating little wart. Always bothering my poor Master…" She heaved a great weary sigh before suddenly snapping around, turning on a dime with a furious shriek.

Her cold, alien hand was around my throat in an instant, screaming out her rage. Fear filled my belly but I refused to let her see it. She would only use it against me, feed off of it to prolong her own miserable endless life.

"You want answers? YOU WANT THEM? Then I will show you exactly where you came from, little prince!"

Darkness began to creep in at the edges of my vision and a sudden, overwhelming terror crept into my mind. My baby…What would happen to my baby? My arms shrank away from trying to pry her bony hands from my throat to shielding my belly protectively. All I could hear was her shrieking laughter in my ear as my world faded to darkness.

~o~

Her Master would rise again. Just as he had said. And she would be the tool of his rise to power once more. The Sleeper lay on the floor, prone and unconscious, his arms still wrapped protectively around his distended stomach. As if she would hurt her Master's vessel! A child born of the Savior and the Dark Lord…nothing would be more powerful. It would be such a pity not to use such an event to their advantage. And besides…the little brat needed to be taught a lesson for conceiving with that disgusting elf. His body was their Master's alone. What else was he good for? They couldn't kill him and they couldn't let him loose. Their Master deserved everything he could give him after that brat stole his body so many Ages ago. This was a proper and fitting punishment. She cackled and began to chant. The book in her hands was the same she had held when he'd arrived. She had been preparing for this day for some time. An Age of Men…A beam of twisting dark magic shot up from the book as she canted, piercing the ceiling and shooting up into the sky. Her robes whipped around her and a fine mist began to fill the room, twisting and condensing, thickening until it found its way to Valokiloren. The shiny black shadow slipped in through his mouth, eyes and nose, drawing out and strengthening from within his very body. Bellatrix finished the last of the incantation with a hiss, the beam dying out as she shut the book. Her eyes narrowed at the remembrance of her Master's parsletongue, the spell reminding her much of the sibilant sounds. Such a beautiful language for a beautiful man. No, not a man…a god. She shuddered. Closed eyes slammed open and instead of fiery emeralds looking back at her, red eyes looked out through his still body.

R&R!


	10. Emergence

A/N: So I know its been foreeevvveeerrrr since I updated this story. I apologize, my lovelies. I hit a bit of a slump a few months ago and haven't written really anything since. I'm shaking myself outof this funk though. It's been far too long since I was in my own element.

Disclaimer: I own nothing but a ugly, stupid, pretty dog name Merceillious.

Chapter Ten~~~ Emergence

'I dreamed a dream in time gone by,

When hope was high and life worth living.

I dreamed that love would never die,

I dreamed that God would be forgiving.'

The top of the mountain cracked with a deafening, whip-like snap, a great column of inky black unlight bursting forth up into the heavens. It was just as it was when Valo had sent up the call so much time ago, when their lives together had been young and they had hunted Uruks through Fangorn. This light had an unholy feel to it, a cold that crept into the very bone. Something was stirring from the deep. Something that could turn the tides again and, as before, Valo was at the center of it all once more. The eye of the storm. The beam's origin wasn't far off. They could still make it yet! Aragorn urged Brego on, pushing them all towards his missing heir, come death or victory.

'Hold on, Eldarion. I'm coming.' The King of Men promised to the winds and dark.

(~¤~)

It was dark and it hurt here. In this place there was no sea, no relief, no light. Everything hurt here. I curled up into a small ball, hugging what felt like my knees to my chest, even though I had no physical form. My soul was accustomed to a bodily form. It remembered having arms and legs, fingers, toes and torso. A beating heart. The darkness around me pulsed suddenly in time with that self-same heart beat, impossibly loud with no boundaries. I hugged my humanity to me like a blanket, wrapping myself up tightly in the memory that this was not all, I had a life outside of this blackness. If I could make myself as small as possible, a smaller target, maybe it would hurt less. Inside myself, I knew it would do me no good. All, at once I was back in that tiny cramped cupboard, the taste of terror on my tongue and the sounds of white hot rage beyond that small locked door. Locked to keep me in, not to keep things out. As if I were some wild, untamed thing. Was this where I came from? A sickening feeling told me that, yes, it was.

The sounds of shouting became louder as did the heavy 'thump, thump' of footsteps above. I was under the stairs? The sound stopped and, somehow, that was the most frightening part of all. It was a cue that more pain was on its way. The door was yanked open violently, shattering the hinge and part of the door frame. Nothing came though. No blows, no curses. The portal beyond was cavernous, like the great gaping maw of some beast poised to swallow me whole. I was stuck. Terrified to move, too terrified to stay. I crept silently through the breach, hyper aware of the slightest sound or movement. The dark began to clear, leaving me standing in some sort of nursery. It was strange, but familiar. A moving mobile spun around with small golden winged balls and broomsticks hovering over the empty crib. There should be a child there. The scene was all wrong, I knew it. There should be a baby with green eyes here. My hand fell to the edge of the crib, caressing the soft white wood as if it's smoothness could bring me answers. Bring them it did. As soon as my hand passed over the surface, the door to the room burst open and a woman ran through. She was frantic, her red hair dancing around her in soft curls and her emerald eyes flashing with her fear. I had a moment to think what a beauty she was before she turned her back to me, spreading her arms out wide. Those vivacious eyes glared at the doorway ahead with nothing short of contemptible terror. She stood firm and resolute. She was protecting the crib? No...she was protecting me. She had a fae look about her in her fury. She reminded me of the high elves, the Sindarin, and of flowers. Of lilies. Lily. This was my mother. My mother protected me and it took no time at all before I realized why. My master stood in the doorway, a short staff -a wand?- pointed menacingly towards my mother. Somehow, I knew that my father was dead, killed at the hands of the man who owned me.

He looked different. Younger, more human. Sauron had many names and incarnations through the Ages and even though I did not recognize this one, his parasitic aura was menacing and unmistakable.

"Don't hurt Harry! Take me! Please don't hurt my Harry!" She cried in a last attempt to save her child's life.

My hands fluttered to my stomach at the sight. Would I eventually have to plead for the life of my child too, just as my mother did before me? I knew better than anyone that her pleas would get her nowhere. Sauron liked to hear people beg. It excited him, thrilled him. I had the scars from his tender affections as proof, an indomitable evidence I would carry for life.

"Stand aside, foolish woman!"

The sound slowly began to leech from the memory as if the whole world were going silent but the events still played out before my eyes. Even though my mother, the woman who gave me this cursed life, stood inches from me, it was the Dark Lord that my eyes remained riveted on. His face contorted in a rage that I knew all too well and he shouted a soundless curse. I could not bear him, my world had become muted, but i knew exactly what words he had uttered that produced that sickening, bright green light. They shook themselves free from the cobwebs of the deepest recesses of my thoughts. Before I could analyze the sensation, the words had risen from the trenches within me, spilling over my lips like black sludge.

"Avada Kedavra..."

(~¤~)

"My Lord..." The Keeper groveled on the ground at his feet as he flexed his borrowed body's fingers experimentally.

It wouldn't have worked at all if he and Valokiloren weren't so compatible, magically and physically. Once his pet bore his new Vessel, he would be more powerful than before, without the ties that his last body had. Sauron sneered down at his body's swollen stomach. The great Dark Lord carrying a child, even his own? Disgraceful. Whelping was only for breeding mares like his wayward pet. Speaking of which...he ignored his servant's fawning at his ankles to flare out his awareness. There, just outside the cavern. Gandalf the White and the christened King of Men. What was this? His little whore's lover as well. How delightful.

"Bellatrix." The Dark Lord snapped out, interrupting her praises without thought. He had no time for her sponging of his favors tonight. Tonight was for revolution, for putting plans into motion. Plans that did not include getting caught up with that thrice damned Maiar, "This body is still weak and fragile. The Fellowship approaches and I have not the time nor the strength in this fragile body to do battle at this time. Summon one of my beasts and then go forth to gather those still loyal. Search the deepest dungeons of Dol Guldur, the outer reaches of my realm and everywhere in between. When my new body arrives I want my armies and allies amassed to wipe the race of Men and Elf-kind off of the face of this Middle Earth." His voice was a frigid hiss between his teeth.

"As you command, my Lord."

(~¤~)

I watched with open-faced horror as the mountain top cracked further and a great, rotting, writhing thing crawled from it's deep underbelly. A Fell Beast dragged from the grave with that darkest of sorcery. Sauron had been called Necromancer in my homeland when he inhabited the Hill of Sorcery, dragging unsuspecting elves to their demise in the depths of his stronghold there. Elves like my beautiful mother. It may have been my beloved riding that monstrosity but Valo was not there. The posture, the red, red eyes, red as spilled blood, the tainted aura that flowed from his being, the familiarity chilled and sickened me to my very inner fabric. The creature took to the skies heading over the mountains to the West, and no amount of shouting or pushing my mount could bring my husband back to my arms. All we could do was try to follow. That was the promise I made, after all. To follow him to the end, whatever end. I could tell by Estel's tears that he had promised much the same.

A/N: Sorry it's abit shorter than usual but I promise to get regular about updates again. Much love and ado about nothing.


	11. The Necromancer

A/N: Lol reviews already, I love it. :p Keep up the reviews and I'll keep up the chapters!

Disclaimer: Nothing is mine. Cept this remote. And that's all I need! First person to get that reference is amazing. Lol.

Chapter Eleven~~~

'If I was young and unafraid,

When dreams were made and used and wasted.

And there's no ransom to be paid,

No song unsung, no wine untasted.'

"What the Valar is going on?! Was that-! I just don't know what to believe anymore." Legolas raged, his fist coming down on the rocky Mordor ground frustratedly.

It was all too similar to how things had been back then. Valo gone, unreachable, and the rest of us helpless but to follow his trail once again. Gandalf gave the whinnying Shadowfax an affectionate pat but his expression was pensive and dark.

"I have reason to believe that Sauron lives still. That a shard of his soul lives on inside Valo, regaining it's strength throughout the past months. Sauron must still hold his old possessiveness over his past Consort. He would do anything to prevent Valo from belonging to anyone else, from disputing his immortal claim to him, baring anyone else's child..." Gandalf said sternly though his voice softened when he saw the distraught expression on Legolas's face.

The elf looked as if the very fabric of his world had been yanked cruelly out from beneath him. I touched his shoulder comfortingly. Eldarion was my child, yes, but to know that the death of my own unborn heir was premeditated...it must be an indescribable feeling. A tearing away at everything you knew and loved.

"You...you think that Sauron is inside my mate and that he...what? Killed our child? What now then? Surely you don't suggest..."

Surely he didn't suggest we dispose of Valo. My hand fluttered down to the hilt of my sword, more to remind myself it was there than for true use. Gandalf sighed, leaning on his staff and looking more weary than ever.

"For the time being, it may be wisest to find him and take him to the Council for safety. It is clear to our eyes that Sauron has once more taken control of Valo's body. He could regenerate. I will only take him for the time, for safety, not permanently. There, a good friend of mine and I will study these marks and Valo himself. We may be able to bind Sauron's soul to an object and destroy it, as was meant to be done with the One Ring. I will not let anyone make a decision about Valo's fate without getting all of the truth first."

I could see that the Istari's words brought Legolas no comfort. What a group we made. Valo's husband, father and mentor. We were a rather hopeless trio but perhaps that was why we were the best ones for this mission. We knew Eldarion better than anyone living. We had the drive to find him that others wouldn't.

"Legolas, can you send for aid from Mirkwood?" I entreated him thoughtfully, pulling Brego's reins up to slow him.

The frown on my friend's face was bitter. I had nearly forgotten about Legolas's people's rejection of Valo. How sad...that Legolas could not look to his own family and people to accept the one he loved.

"My father will not help us in this, I am ashamed to say. We are on our own."

Then on our own it shall be.

~(¤)~

The Morannon was silent and still below where once it had bustled and surged with my followers and creations. My pet was put to rest, a prisoner inside his own body. For the moment. My powers were still too weak to cage him indefinitely. It was an end result I would have to pursue, however. It was clear the traitorous whore couldn't be left to his own devices. He was useless without a master and he knew it. The bane of my existence since that foul day he was born. Once my strength returned and the child was reared to an easily manageable age, Harry Potter would no longer be an issue. No longer a thorn in my side. I would miss having the use of his sweet flesh. Perhaps I could simply obliterate his mind, leaving his body open for my use. It never hurt to have a spare vessel in any case. My youth had taught me to exercise caution. He would be a liability with his newly returning memories. Wiping his memory again would likely result in permanent brain damage anyways, so that was out of the question. Destroying his mind would be the easiest and least hassling in the end. Once my new Vessel was primed, there would be no more of this irritation from the last of my Horcruxes.

~(¤)~

My child was growing. I could feel it's pulse against my consciousness, feather-light and quick as a bird. I cradled it against me, humming and whispering, my mind to it's. My child hadn't decided whether to be a girl or a boy yet but I treasured every moment of growth, every second of contact. I knew my master would not let me go unpunished for my transgressions against him this time. His vengeance would be a terrible thing and I knew I would likely not survive it. I may not get to see my baby once it was brought into this world. I had been foolish to believe in the Dark Lord's empty, poisonous words again. An unwitting insect into a Venus Fly Trap, tempted to doom by honey and sweetness. I would not fall into his traps again. In the darkness of my own mind, hidden deep down in my own Despair where Sauron dared not go, I began to plan.

~(¤)~

We were just crossing the Harad Road to the south of the Dead Marshes when we heard the call. It was a long low cry for attention across the cool field. It was deep and melodious and the moment that four figures approached over the swell of the low hill, my face broke into the first true smile it had beheld since my beloved and I had left Mirkwood. Help had arrived from an unexpected flank, thank the Valar. Gimli, the newly christened Lord of the White Mountain Dwarven Realm, gave a great booming laugh at the sight of us. A pipe protruded from his smiling lips. Time had been good to Gimli, son of Gloin. His settling of the Glittering Caves beneath Helm's Deep had been a booming success. His beard had grown a few inches and was tied in two braids hanging beneath his chin. He had a scar on the side of his face now but it only served to make him look all the more distinguished paired with the dwarven armor he wore. His comrades looked no less fierce, all three looking as though they were heading into battle.

"Well if it isn't our favorite pointy-earred princeling! Aragorn and dear Gandalf! I wish this could be called a social visit. Lord Elrond sent word of what happened." A heavy hand fell on my shoulder as our friend joined my side. I never thought I'd be happier to be mocked in all of my long years, " I'm so sorry, my friend, to hear of such a loss...We have come to help bring Valo home again."

"You are most welcome, Gimli, as are your companions. We could use some allies at the moment." Aragorn's voice was filled with gratitude.

Sometimes, it was easy to forget that I wasn't the only one who was feeling Valo's loss. Aragorn had taken him as his own son, given him a new name and a home. Valo didn't just belong to me, he belonged to us all. We were all feeling his absence like a blow.

"I'm ashamed to say that our quest has not been looked on entirely favorably. We have much of the journey been on our own. Now, I fear that Sauron may be attempting to return using Valo's body itself." Gandalf's words made the happiness of the reunion melt away and a somber mood to fall over the seven of us.

Would we ever have peace? Or must Valo be gone and buried before the world was through with the likes of Sauron?

"Then we can waste no more time."

We were off once more except this time with a larger company and a slightly lessened burden on our hearts.

~(¤)~

Valokiloren stood before the ruined tower of Numenor with a sneer. His orange eyes blazed in fury as he entered the now forbidden, derelict place. The water had done much damage. No matter. What he sought remained unharmed by the elements. The small figure whispered a strange charm that encased his head in a clear sphere and dove into the murky cool water. It was a treacherous path he swam. The ruins of Isengard were embodied in crumbling foundations, jagged splintered beams and a great many fatally placed spears from when the armory and Saruman's smithy were flooded. More than once did he have to turn back to find another route to his destination due to collapsed corridors and barricaded impassable rooms. The corpses of Morgul orcs and Uruk-hai alike rotted beneath the rubble, returning back to their basic elements. Back to the mud and silt that they were fashioned from. Orcs were a pathetic lot. This time, he would do much better. Ideas of creatures both horrific and powerful drifted through his daydreams.

He surfaced in a chamber that still held air, stinking and fouled as it was by the body rotting nearby. Saruman's corpse lay half in the water, half out of it. It had protected from scavengers but the water had washed away pieces. A finger missing here and there, lips drawn back and eyes rotted out due to time and decay. He'd seen worst. Sauron rubbed at the burning sensation on his chest, furious at the discomfort. It had been slowly beginning to build for the last fortnight now, a steady ache building into a burn. It became outright agonizing when he began to pool the dark magic up within this pathetic, weak body. He needed a follower, a servant capable of wielding magic for him. Sauron pushed that blackest of magics out of his host's body and into the corpse in the floor. They didn't call him the Necromancer for nothing after all. The body gave a great heave, a jerk. It was as if an invisible cord flowed from the center of it's chest to the Dark Lord, calling it back to the land of the living. There was a small movement in the water and a finger, now only bone and scraps of flesh, wriggled back to it's origin like a demented worm. All of the pieces were coming together. It was a grisly sight. At last the horrific thing jerk to its feet, it's movement as if all of its limbs were only partially animated.

Water dripped from the sodden figure like some morbid hourglass, drops instead of sand. Saruman was a waste of a man, his multicolored cloak he donned dirty and bloodied from his subsequent impaling a year ago, his beard tangled and filled with twigs. His skin had taken on a waxy, grey green hue, the smell of rot clinging to him like perfume. The Maiar had been stripped of his staff, of his means of spell weaving and his life but Sauron could feel the magic still simmering below the surface of the Wizard's skin. Magic that he could utilize. He gave the downtrodden Wizard his most convincing smirk, holding out his hand.

"Find your place at my side again, cousin, and I shall deliver to you all the powers beyond your reckoning. Revenge against those that stole your life. Serve me and walk the earth once more or return to your watery grave."

This seemed to be all the Wizard had been waiting for, for Saruman's aged and blackened teeth formed into a cruel grin, his death pale flesh stretching obscenely. He took the small, outstretched hand greedily, his movements stiff and jerky with disuse.

"My Lord."

A/N: I know that this story seems like its going abit fast and I do apologize for that but unlike in the first installment of this series, Where The Sleeper Wakes simply doesn't have a lot of opportunity for filler chapters. Don't forget to review!


	12. Rue: Herb of Grace

Disclaimer: Nope.

Chapter Twelve~~~Rue; Herb Of Grace

But the tigers come at night

With their voices soft as thunder

As they tear your hope apart

As they turn your dream to shame

"You have been disobedient. If it weren't for the child within you, it would be for the last time."

"I know, Master. I'm sorry...I'm just weak on my own, Master. I need you, please. Tell me what to do."

I knew I wasn't dreaming, despite the hazy quality everything had taken on. It was because Sauron was weak. He couldn't hold solid form yet. I knew it, he knew it. The Dark Lord was a sucker for someone giving him power over them. Voldemort was a sucker for power over people, especially free power. It wasn't free, but he didn't have to know that. I kneeled before him, one hand on my swollen belly and the other reaching for him. My Master's form writhed in dangerous fury. That wasn't how I wanted him. He was unpredictable when he was angry.

"Yes you are, my wretched one. I will tell you exactly what to do and you will obey but I think a punishment is in order first. One that will last this time."

With a snap of his fingers, a shuddering, whimpering figure materialized on the ground. It was wearing robes crusted with blood and vomit and lay curled in as small of a ball as a person could achieve. It's breathing was ragged and labored as if it were just managing to cling to life. Hazel eyes clouded by agony looked up at me through sweaty black bangs and bile rose in my throat. Tom...

"Harry-" Tom wasn't given time to finish his strangled cry.

Voldemort heaved him up from the floor, a twisted, merciless smirk corrupting the faded vision that was the Dark Lord. Without a pause of regret or thought of a piece of himself, he began the seemingly endless struggle to push Tom inside of himself, to reintegrate the wayward soul piece. It wasn't a gentle progress, though. Tom shrieked out in agony, his screams rebounding off of the inside of my brain as more and more of him became part of Sauron once more. He cried and begged and screamed and screamed and screamed. At some point I could see that he had fallen quiet, his face slack and remaining body limp as more of his was eaten away by the Dark Lord, but all I could hear were his cries still bouncing around the walls of my mind. Voldemort's body became more solid as the moments passed until, when the last bit of Tom was gone forever, he remained whole inside of me. There was a gut wrenching, sickening smirk on his face as if he knew what he had just stolen from me. He killed Tom! My only friend these last few agonizing months! The only one who could help me without thinking about what he could receive in return! The only one I could talk to about my last life! Gone. Just like mine and Legolas's baby. How many people had to die before this was all over? And my baby...he was going to hurt my baby too. That was not going to happen. Not if I was alive to have anything to say about it. Sauron would pay for everything he's done, all the lives he's destroyed. I likely wouldn't survive this voyage but I was going to make Valar sure that he paid for what he's done. It was time to stop letting others fight my battles for me. It was time to make things right again. I looked at the father of my child through tear swollen eyes and vowed then and there to see his end.

~(¤)~

We were closing in on him. Slowly but surely. For some reason, he had traded out the flying Fell Beast for horses. Tracks reported that he had a companion as well. Who? Surely the Dark Lord could not have regained a body so quickly? Luck was in our favor though. They were moving slowly. Very slowly. What if, somehow, by the Valar, Valo truly was pregnant? The herbs had started appearing quite some time ago. He would be heavy with child by now.

I could barely sleep at night for fear of my little husband's safety. Those red eyes...They were unmistakable and now Gandalf was saying Sauron had killed our baby? How far did the journey go? Would we ever be completely free of that mad man's taint? Would Valo ever be free? One of my greatest fears was that, before the end of this madness, I was going to have to end Valo's precious life, to put him down like some wild animal. Could I do such a terrible thing? Sometimes it seemed as though the Valar were sworn against our union. As if they were bound and determined to see us torn away from one another. I just wanted him home. Back here, in my arms where he belonged. All else was trivial nonsense.

I loved him. Small, awkward, frightened and memory-less as he was, I loved him with all of my spirit. I would forsake any oath, abandon any bonds if only to have him at my side. The beauty of it all was that, even though I would do any of those things for his happiness, Valo is the one person who would never ask me to. That was how mates worked. The one person you would do anything for, is the person who would never want you to. He came to me, baring his weakness for my perusal, giving me all that he could be and took me as I was, defects and blessings alike. Aragorn paced near the borders of our camp light, trying to discern the mysteries of his son's condition from the tracks they had left behind. Aragorn had to put aside the Ranger in him to become King of Men but it wasn't the King who sought after his missing child, it was the simple Ranger from the North. It was the father who lived off of the land seeking what he had lost, not the King.

"Estel. Tula, hama neva i'naur." I called out to my friend softly.

Our dwarf companions were whispering in closed quarters across the fire, their eyes occasionally shifting to the shadows warily. Gandalf smoked his pipe at my side, unconcerned with their concerns as a fish concerns itself with the sky. Aragorn turned to me, a heavy desperation in his eyes. He hadn't been taking much rest either.

"How? How can I sit and take rest when Eldarion is out there somewhere? With that monster?"

"By keeping in mind that you're no good to him exhausted or dead." Gimli's voice cut through the King's moment of panic like a hammer on an enemy. Swift but bringing soothing peace. "You need rest, Aragorn. We'll be able to follow his tracks better come first light. Or what passes for it in this place."

As much as I could see him struggle with it, Aragorn came grudgingly and sat next to us at the fire. No one called him out on the fact that his eyes continued to search the darkness as if his child would appear at any moment. We allowed him his small hope. It was all any of us had nowadays.

A/N: I know it's short but I wanted to go ahead and get this out so you guys had SOMETHING and didn't forget about this story altogether or think I'd abandoned it altogether.


	13. Sweet Dreams Are Made of These

A/N: I know, I know, it's been a terribly long time since I updated. I was originally planning to use Radaghast in this story but I've decided that the movie version is simply too different from the incarnation of him I was going to use. I pictured him as being a burly sort of bear of a man so I've had to tweak my ending and a few chapters abit. :p

Disclaimer: Nothing.

Chapter Thirteen~~~ Sweet Dreams Are Made of These

It wasn't real. I knew it wasn't, this world I had dreamed for myself. It was a shield to hide from the pain. Loss was kept at bay even for a short time. I walked through the halls of a school that was until recently forgotten, lost in my memories. Hidden away, just as I had been so many years ago. It was moments like these that my true age wore on me, when I could feel the drain and heaviness of the Ages on my shoulders. How had I become this thing? This undying, ever feeling thing that was always at the whims of others? No more though. I was going to turn things around. I would be the Master of my own fate from this moment henceforth. No one would rule me any longer. I was hurt though, reeling from the loss of a piece of myself. Tom's death had be brutal and harsh. Even as I walked the halls of Hogwarts, halls that had once felt so friendly and warm to me, I could feel it like a great shadow looming over the horizon of my heart.

In the darkest corners of the dungeons I had walked in this imaginary place, I could hear his dying cries even still. Horror knew a true name, a true face. I knew it like an old friend but it was no cold comfort. How could I have just stood there helpless as my lifelong companion, my friend, was devoured? The question weighed heavier on me than even time. The halls were only occasionally filled with lively chattering and the bustle of bodies. None of them I knew, really. I suppose I would see a face here and there that I recalled but that was the problem, really. It was the same faces I had seen in my visions, only repeated, superimposed over every face in this dream within a nightmare. Walking through the Great Hall, I saw thirty different Hermione faces, and just as many Ronalds, Dracos, Dumbledore and Snapes. There were many copies and copies of copies filling in where real people would be.

I tried not to think about it. Thinking about it would make the dream crumble and for the moment, just for this moment, I was taking comfort in it. My memories were returning, the onslaught was nearly complete, but at a terrible, terrible price. What a price... I wondered sometimes, as I gazed off of the Astronomy Tower or wandered down by the lake in the night if it wasn't a baby's cries I heard in the twilight. If it wasn't the sound of a soft, rapid heart beat echoing over the green Quidditch Pitch. Soft and fluttering as a bird, almost a frightening sound in it's fragility. I had become so immersed in my own thoughts within thoughts that I very nearly missed the man standing next to me. Sometime in my wanderings I had stopped, statue-like in the middle of a corridor. The corridor by the Entrance Hall, my wearied mind supplied.

"Hello, Lucius."

"Mister Potter."

It had been many many years since I had seen this face of his and not the rotted face of the Mouth. This Lucius, I recalled, had once been regal, even beautiful in his coldness. He had been harsh but had loved his family like no one ever could. Was it that same love that had led him to follow a mad man? Love could do terrible things to a person. It could warp you into something unrecognizable, a monster.

"It isn't real, you know." His voice was soft like it had never been in all of my life. Not to me at least.

"I know."

"You must go back now."

My heart seemed to stutter for a moment. Now? Yes, I suppose it was time. My body was so weak out there, though. How much longer would I live before Death took me? COULD I die, even if I wished it? My life was tied to that of Sauron. Or was it still? He had devoured the piece of himself within me, right? So did that abolish our bond to one another? It was a question I may end up gambling my life on later, unfortunately.

"Yes...It's time, I believe."

With the slow transition that only came from a dreamer arising from a deep and powerful sleep, the Hogwarts that had once been my home began to peel away. Bricks, mortar, drapes and floors began to fade into nothingness as I stirred back to myself and the world that was my present.

Saruman gave me a deep sneer as I returned to myself. My emerald eyes were a dead give away that I was back instead of the Dark Lord.

"Child."

My body was tired and heavy. It ached everywhere and hunger knawed at my insides. I was not in the mood for his disdain. I was fading a little more every day. The parasitic monster inside me was leeching my life away. I was pale and drawn, I couldn't sleep or eat. I only prayed that the Dark Lord left enough life within me for my child to survive.

"But not too much of a child to bear your Master's spawn, is that it? So stuff it before I stuff it for you, you great dead lout." I hissed in his direction, wincing as the child within me gave an unholy kick.

Something sharper seemed to tear at me but I ignored it in favor of rubbing soothing circles on the swollen belly. It would be time soon. Not long at all. Everything had to be perfect. A perfect place for my perfect baby. Somewhere safe and warm and clean. Overlooking the sea, maybe. Another crippling kick jarred me. Saruman ignored my comment in favor of making camp, his dislike only made tangible by the audible snaps and cracks that his magic made when he summoned it to use. A sudden warmth beneath me followed by a jerking pain in my belly brought me back to the here and now. No...no it was too early! We weren't in a safe place yet! This wasn't safe! It wasn't clean! It had to be perfect! My distress did not go unnoticed. That wretched wizard stood, suddenly at my side, jerking me to my feet.

"They approach."

~ 0 ~

At last, we had caught up to them! I couldn't imagine what must be going through my friend's mind right now as we looked on my lost and found child. Arwen's heart would be broken at the sight we were faced with. Legolas took in his wayward spouse for the first time in many months. His fears were confirmed and worst than he could have imagined. Saruman sneered at their Fellowship as they took in the sight, already armed to do harm. Valo stood with only the assistance of his undead steed, his belly great and round with child. A child not his own. The knowledge had stunned and angered the elf but to actually see it for himself was a blow like no other before it. In his heart, though, he knew it wasn't Valo's fault. He was just an unwitting pawn, a plaything of a monster who used him for his own malevolent gain. His beloved was panting, looking thin and tired. No one should be traveling in his condition, the journey being strenuous on both babe and mother. Valo had been on the trail his entire pregnancy and the strain showed. He made a small sound of distress, holding his swelled stomach in apparent discomfort. Legolas ached to go to him, to hold him and reassure himself of his beloved's wellbeing but the obstinate and deadly sorcerer stood between them, pointing a wand of some sort at them. Valo looked to be whispering to his child, sweaty hair clinging to his face, ignoring the brewing fight around him.

"You shall not have victory here, Aragorn, Ranger King. This is my lord's resurrection at hand. It is too late to try and stop it now. You are months too late."

"You are going to use the babe to bring Sauron back to physical form. He is going to possess the child." Gandalf said this with no doubt in his mind at all.

Saruman's ruined figure gave a snarling smirk. Valo was hunching over the steed, his face drawn and in pain. Legolas felt his stomach drop in horror and disgust. Sauron was going to possess the unborn baby? He was using Valo as some sort of sick incubator for his new body! He couldn't allow that. That baby may not be his but it was Valo's child and father or not, that meant that he would treat it as his own, love it like his own. That meant that no Dark Lord would be using their baby for their own ill gains. Period. Valo gave a twisted cry of pain, a sound filled with agony and fear. He fell to his knees, gasping for breath and I fought the urge to go to him. There was no telling what Saruman may do to Valo if they tried to approach. Gandalf turned a heady glare to his once comrade.

"Your vessel is breaking down, Saruman! Valo will die without aid! He cannot birth this thing alone." His voice boomed with authority and sincerity.

A hiss trickled out from between Valo's lips, drawing their attention back to him. He stumbled to his feet shakily, his eyes crimson red and enraged.

"You're right, Greybeard. My vessel cannot do this alone." The voice that came from the small body was not his own.

They were no longer dealing with Valo, the beloved husband and child. They were dealing with Sauron, The Dark Lord. Saruman reached out to assist his master's shaky footing but as soon as his gnarled hand made contact with Valo's body, quick as a serpent, Sauron reached out, grabbing him around the throat. The terrifying grin that spread across his face was enough to have even the once Istari quaking in fear. Without hesitation, Sauron sealed his lips over Saruman's. For a moment, it looked as though he was merely kissing his minion...but then, before their eyes, Sauron began to take back the life he had given. Saruman began to wither and die, his arms flailed weakly, leaving shallow scratches along Valo's arms. It was a gruesome sight to see. Saruman's body began to age, wither with an audible sucking, cracking sound. His eyes eventually burst with liquid from their sockets and he collapsed to the ground, his mouth gaping and blackened in his mummified state. He had the look of someone who had been dead in a dry place for some time. Valo, however, did look better. He looked less hollow, more color was in his cheeks though he was still rather pale. He brought his foot down on Saruman's dessicated corpse cruelly, that same sick smirk spreading across his face.

"There's nothing you can do now, Mithradir, nor you, King of Men," he spat, his voice filled with hate, "Nothing can stop me now. I will be reborn and I will be sent to another land and another hapless fool will fall under the spell of an 'innocent' child. Just as it was here, it will be so again and again until all realms belong to Sauron. I am everlasting."


	14. Happy Is The Heart That Still Feels Pain

A/N: Yeah, I know, it's been forever lol. This will likely be the last chapter of this installment of the Sleeper series. I do eventually intend for this to be a trilogy with a prequel coming next. It is a shorter chapter and I know it seems a little rushed but to be honest, I was just really ready to get this out. I was starting to fear I'd never finish it if I didn't go ahead.

Disclaimer: I own nothing. Don't sue.

Chapter Fourteen...Happy Is The Heart That Still Feels Pain

Gandalf observed the Dark Lord with a frown, not moving as the small fellowship drew down on their loved one. His bristled, grey eyebrows were furrowed in a heavy confusion as if he could see something within the figure that the others could not. Sauron summoned the fallen wand to his hands from where it had fallen by Saruman's carcass. It obeyed his command, flying into his outstretched hand and he leveled it at his opponents. Still, the Istari did not move to oppose him.

"What's the matter, Gray Beard? Have you at last seen your own feebleness? Will you lay down and allow your death to come so easily?" His words came out in a laughing hiss, as if from a serpent of the deep.

Aragorn flicked his eyes to the Maiar, concern filling his entire body. He found Gandalf's lips curving up into the tiniest of smirks though, not a man who had given up.

"I may die today, but not by your hand. Are you not feeling well, Sauron? Is your hold feeling somewhat...tenuous, perhaps?"

Sauron sneered in response though there was no missing the tremble of the wand tip in his hand, the tightening of the skin around his eyes and the perspiration that dotted just above his lip. He released a hiss of fury, shaking his head. His crimson eyes were wide with agony. He had chosen to take possession of his host at a most unfortunate moment. Valo was going into labor and the pain was helping the young wizard to fight off the Dark Lord's influence. A particularly painful contraction had the tyrant crumbling over the Fell creature but the cry that burst from the small, swollen body was Valo's own. Impossibly green eyes turned to them fearfully but with a steely determination. His thin hands shook as he raised the wand to his own chest.

"Gandalf, you will have only a few moments after I'm dead to save my baby. Please don't let this be for nothing..." His voice did not waiver or quiver, it was cool and steadfast.

Valo intended to drag Sauron with him. He was his last tie to the realm of the living. Once that last bit inside of Valo dies, the Dark Lord would be gone from the lands of Middle Earth for good.

"No!"

"Valo!"

"Sectumsemp-"

Valo gasped as his wand was dug from his stiff fingers by a kind faced wizard. Gandalf smiled down at him, touching his trembling cheek. Twisted, paper-thin hands came up to cradle the back of Valo's head as periwinkle eyes leveled with his own.

"You will not lose your life today, my boy. I have been long for this world and my home calls me back. It will be my honor to take Sauron back with me. He will be judged by the Valar and by those who allowed him entrance to this world in the first place. It is as I said, I may lose my life today but not at Sauron's hands. This is my choice." The old Istari's voice was calm and sure, and Valo's lips quivered as he looked into the face of the man who meant to give him his life back.

They had followed him across Middle Earth, faced terrible odds and dangers to bring him home. These were the people who loved him. Just like the Weasley's and Dumbledore and Hermione. He threw his arms around the man, sobbing with grief, relief and pain as another contraction hit. Gandalf began to chant in a low, nearly hissed, deep whisper, drawing Sauron's soul out and into a small, rounded pendant on a chain while Legolas and Aragorn lay Valo down on the ground. It so resembled Slytherin's locket that Valo gave a hysterical laugh out loud. He could think clearer now than he had in centuries and-Merlin- he was in labor. When the Maiar began to dissolve into a fine mist was the only time he found himself distracted from the intense pain radiating through his body. The Istari was using his ties to Valinor in order to disappear from Arda with all haste. He wasn't going to give Sauron any chance to escape punishment. He laid a hand on Valo's shaking body with a proud, tired smile.

"Rest your fears, my boy, and be at peace." And then he was gone, carried off with the wind.

Another strong contraction hit and Valo was being undressed quickly as his cries heightened in intensity. Fortunately, just as the men were beginning to panic, a horn sounded nearby and a troupe of Elves, the last from Rivendale, it appeared, spilled quickly from the trees. With more than a few sighs of relief, a medic came forward. She was a no nonsense kind of woman, who ejected them all from the immediate premises promptly with a glare in her sapphire eyes. Some of the men erected a makeshift tent around Valo's quaking form for privacy just as the babe was beginning to crown. Lord Elrond placed a hand on the bewildered and anxiety ridden Legolas's shoulder as they listened to the prince's husband's screams.

"All will be well, Legolas. Eldarion will be well."

Legolas was taken aback for a moment. It was the first time he had ever heard Lord Elrond call Valo anything but the name given to him by Sauron. Perhaps it really would be alright. All they could do was take his husband home and wait for word that Gandalf had been successful. Valo's pain seemed to have calmed to gentle sobs. The medic, Eleisse, if he remembered correctly, emerged from the tent with a weary nod after quite some time. She gestured for Legolas to enter and he did so with some trepidation. Would the babe be a monster? Would it be disfigured or born with some darkness leftover from it's birth father, Sauron? The sight he walked in on when he entered that tent would stay with him for the rest of his unnaturally long life. The child was...beautiful. It held all of Valo's natural beauty and no sign of taint marred it's soft skin. His tiny husband gave an exhausted laugh, brushing dark hair away from the child's face.

"Sauron would not have wanted such a vessel for long, anyways." Legolas looked at him in question, "It's a girl. A beautiful, precious girl."

He sat next to them, brushing fingers against the little girl's exposed back.

"What shall we name her then, beloved?"

"I think...Lalaith. Lalaith Greenleaf."

Legolas's smile grew larger. Lalaith. Laughter, for she would bring them much joy. It was perfect. Valo didn't seem to mind when he was carried to Imladris, despite his pain. He only had eyes for the husband he had missed and the child that not slept in his arms. They had come upon a farm along the way and bargained for some milk for the child who sucked the concoction down greedily. Lalaith promptly fell asleep afterwards and slept until they were safely within the gates of Rivendale. Aragorn immediately sent a missive to his wife to let her know that they would be home as soon as Valo and Lalaith were fit for travel. Once the rush of their arrival was over, they all sat down together with a scribe and the new parent told the story of his home world and the world of wizards there. He told them of Tom Riddle, of magical schools and of a boy named Harry Potter.

A/N: I KNOW THAT IT'S RUSHED. I know that it's short but if I didn't go ahead and get this last chapter out then I wasn't going to. I decided that having a terrible last chapter was better than leaving the story incomplete. I do eventually intend for there to be a prequel but it won't be out anytime soon. I hope you've enjoyed Where The Sleeper Wakes and thank you for all of those who stuck with me until the end.


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